It Takes a Village
Who would make your list?
One day I plan to win the Academy Award for Best Original Screenplay for my film “A Kidney Between Us” so I need to be ready to give one of those fancy acceptance speeches. Did you know winners only have 45 seconds unless you win one of the big four (Actor, Actress, Director, Film) so my speech will have to be quick and precise. Of course, you have to thank the Academy since they voted for you in the first place. And the fans for getting your film recognized. Cassie…Emma…But who else? Forty-five seconds is a terribly short time to squeeze in every single person who made a difference in your life, so who would be “Oscar worthy?” Because let’s face it. None of us achieves anything in life on our own. As much as the idea of the “self-made man” is part of American society, it’s the ultimate in hubris to think we really didn’t have help. I know people who are fantastic writers who have never had a book published or a script produced; wonderful singers who have never been signed to a record label; artists who haven’t had their work published or put in a gallery and it’s not because they lack talent. Achieving success is the culmination of a great many people and events and choices in our lives and all of them are important.
Successfully raising a child is a lot like being a success at anything.
You can’t do it alone. And I don’t mean being a single parent. There are great single parents who make it work and having both parents around doesn’t guarantee success either. I knew a couple with two kids. Same parents. Same household. Same schools. One of them grew up to be a model student. Helped with the family, got good grades, never got in trouble. The other one was always getting in fights; got sent to the principal’s office time and time again; and started doing drugs and breaking the law. If it was just about good parenting, it wouldn’t make any sense! But it’s not. A child doesn’t grow up in a bubble. They have different friends. They have different teachers. They get involved in different things. All of it adds up to the person they become. If we’re lucky enough to have kids in church, we need to do all we can to be part of that formula for success. Studies have shown the benefits of faith in a child’s life. Overall, they have “higher levels of mental health, lower rates of cancer and heart disease, and significantly greater longevity and quality of life.”[1] They are also more likely to marry, stay married, and have better marriages.[2] As students, they tend to get better grades, less likely to drop out of school, and more likely to do their homework.[3] Who wouldn’t want that for our kids?
But most drift away from their faith.
Even among kids who attended church regularly growing up, nearly two-thirds leave for at least a year or more once they move on to college or careers. Two-thirds![4] Some of them come back, but a lot of them don’t. In our changing church landscape, there are just so many more factors that weigh into it all why it is harder than ever to get our children to come back.[5] According to the Pew Research Center, the number of unaffiliated people (meaning people with no religious affiliation) stands at 28% of the population, up 12% since 2007 when these stats started being tracked.[6] The group that identifies as unaffiliated the most? Millennials and Gen Z.[7] Who knows what it will show for the kids in our churches today? But why? Why do our kids drop out of church? The answers are many and varied. They question our teachings (60%), they don’t like organized religion (47%), and they don’t see a need for religion in their lives (41%) are just a few.[8] They also say things like, “I find God elsewhere” (39%), “It’s not relevant to me” (35%), and “Church is boring” (31%).[9] We need to do a better job of listening to our young people and find a way to better connect them to God, because the way church is now just doesn’t appeal to them. And it needs to. We live in a different age than what the world was like when we were growing up. Having a cell phone would have seemed like Star Trek come true. In fact, when I got my first flip phone, I can’t tell you the number of times I flipped it open and said, “Scotty, beam me up!” For the church to be relevant today we need to listen with both our ears AND our eyes to try our best to retain the kids we have and help new ones know the love of Jesus.
Maybe the solution is in the Bible all this time.
One of the toughest obstacles we have is our own unwillingness to change, but Jesus tells us in very clear words we need to do better. In Matthew, he even gives us this stern warning: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5 And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.” Then he followed that up with another warning, “If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. (Matthew 18:3-6)” Are we truly doing enough to show the love of Christ? Here is one way we can do just that. Please rise for the reading of the Word of God.
4 Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. 6 These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates. – Deuteronomy 6:4-9
It really does take a village to raise a child.
Parents are the most important ingredient to be sure, but parents alone can’t do all the work. We are products of more than just our biology. Friends, church, community, our nation, and our world all contribute to making us who we are. When then First Lady Hillary Clinton wrote her best-selling book with the title It Takes A Village, its purpose was to drive home this point and to inspire us to collectively take responsibility for the welfare of the children in our lives and in our world. In the passage we just read, Moses is talking not just to parents, but to the entire nation of Israel. “Impress (God’s commandments) on your children… Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.” That word “impress” is more than just “teach.” The dictionary defines the word as “to apply with pressure so as to imprint.”[10] Teaching is the transfer of information, but impression is making it part of the person’s character. In this passage, Moses is telling the people of Israel that it is our responsibility to find a way to impress upon the children the lessons of Christ and to live them out as a reminder at all times of what it means to be Christian.
Wouldn’t it be great if you ended up in someone’s “thank you” speech?
What an honor to be placed in that rare category of influential people upon a person’s life. If we take seriously Christ’s call not to hinder the little children, we also have to take seriously Moses’ call to impress upon the children the lessons of Christ. Pray about how you can support the children of our church. When we join, we offer our prayers, presence, gifts, service, and witness. How can we do that for our kids? I’m reminded of a scene from The Untouchable when Eliot Ness and Jimmy Malone are talking in the church and Jimmy says to Eliot, “What are you prepared to do?” And Eliot responds with “Everything within the law.” Jimmy answers, “And then what are you prepared to do?” That is our challenge. Eliot was willing to do whatever he could within the boundaries he was comfortable with, but Jimmy knew that to achieve results they would have to think out of the box. They would have to dare to be different and find solutions that hadn’t been tried yet. Do we have that kind of commitment to our children? It takes a village to impact the life of a child, and YOU are part of their village. What an honor and a responsibility to be part of a child’s life.
[1] David Dollahite, Loren Marks, and Savannah Love, “This is the Way: Helping Youth with Positive Religious Development,” Public Square Magazine, February 26,2025, https://publicsquaremag.org/faith/american-families-of-faith/faith-parenting-raising-kids-stay-religious/ – not an endorsement for the entire article but it had good citations for research and overall the article was very good.
[2] Daniel Peterson, “Sociologist explains how religion benefits even atheists,” Desert News, September 26, 2013, https://www.deseret.com/2013/9/26/20526274/sociologist-explains-how-religion-benefits-even-atheists/
[3] Ibid.
[4] https://research.lifeway.com/2019/01/15/most-teenagers-drop-out-of-church-as-young-adults/
[5] Daniel A. Cox, “Generation Z and the Future of Faith in America,” Survey Center on American Life, March 24, 2022, https://www.americansurveycenter.org/research/generation-z-future-of-faith/#_edn2 – This article was such an interesting and well thought out piece. If you’re curious why it’s harder for kids to rejoin the church after a time away, it’s a good read and explains how this trend is a long time coming generationally.
[6] “Religious ‘Nones’ in America: Who They Are and What They Believe,” Pew Research Center, January 24, 2024, https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2024/01/24/religious-nones-in-america-who-they-are-and-what-they-believe/ – as a side note, 2024 was the first year the number didn’t go up and in fact went down slightly. Too little is known about why that change occurred to make any conclusions.
[7] “PRRI Generation Z Fact Sheet,” Public Religion Research Institute, March 29, 2024, https://prri.org/spotlight/prri-generation-z-fact-sheet/
[8] “Why are ‘nones’ nonreligious?” Pew Research Center, January 24, 2024, https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2024/01/24/why-are-nones-nonreligious/
[9] “What Millennials Want When They Visit Church,” Barna Group, March 4, 2015, https://www.barna.com/research/what-millennials-want-when-they-visit-church/
Why Pray?
Why pray?
I mean it never seems to work right? The other day, I prayed for a million dollars, but I didn’t get it. When I was young, I prayed about being a doctor. I said “doctor” not “pastor.” However, my prayer about the Dodgers winning the World Series seems to have worked out pretty well. Batting .333 in the majors would be considered all-star caliber hitting so maybe it works after all. Whether or not our prayers are answered is often in the eye of the beholder. The devout follower will undoubtedly tell you God hears us. The skeptic will tell you they aren’t sure. And the unbeliever will say belief in the power of prayer is a fairy tale people tell themselves to feel better about living in a random and meaningless world. But what does it mean to say that prayer “works?” If our only measure of effectiveness is “did I get what I want?” then probably no, it doesn’t work. God isn’t a genie in a bottle who is at our beck and call. Prayer is designed differently than that.
Prayer has tons of awesome benefits beyond just creating a wish list for God.
It’s true the scientific results of intercessory prayer have been hit or miss (that’s the kind of prayer where you pray on behalf of someone else), but overall prayer has been scientifically proven to have tons of positive, tangible results. They did a study between prayer and migraines and found that those who pray had fewer headaches and were more tolerant of pain than those who simply meditated.[1] Specifically prayer was more effective than secular meditation. My favorite study done by Florida State University found prayer helps in your marriage. When at least one spouse offers petitionary prayer for the other, those couples had “increased relationship satisfaction, greater trust, cooperation, forgiveness and marital commitment. Many of these benefits apply both to the prayer as well as the one being prayed for.”[2] Other studies have shown prayer can reduce stress, anxiety, and negative emotions and give you hope.[3]
Jesus never tells us to do something that doesn’t help us.
Everything Jesus commands is meant to make life better both personally and as a society. Prayer, gratitude, helping one another all have benefits on a micro and macro level. And we’re going to the garden in Gethsemane to find out more. Jesus is going off to pray to God the Father while a couple of his disciples go with him. This follows immediately after the Last Supper. But what I hope you focus on in this telling of the story is Jesus’ purpose in praying. When we discover that, I think we can best answer the question “Why pray?”
32They went to a place called Gethsemane, and Jesus said to his disciples, “Sit here while I pray.” 33He took Peter, James and John along with him, and he began to be deeply distressed and troubled. 34“My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death,” he said to them. “Stay here and keep watch.”
35Going a little farther, he fell to the ground and prayed that if possible the hour might pass from him. 36“Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”
37Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. “Simon,” he said to Peter, “are you asleep? Could you not keep watch for one hour? 38Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak.”
39Once more he went away and prayed the same thing. 40When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. They did not know what to say to him.
41Returning the third time, he said to them, “Are you still sleeping and resting? Enough! The hour has come. Look, the Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. 42Rise! Let us go! Here comes my betrayer!” – Mark 14:32-42
Praying aligns us with God’s will.
Even Jesus prays to discover what God has in store for him; that’s the power of prayer. It’s so strong that Christ, in the most difficult moment of his life turns to the Lord in prayer to seek out his will. That’s not the only reason we pray, because Jesus still asks him to take this burden from him. God wants to know what is on your heart and he wants to share that burden with you. Jesus prays, “Take this cup from me.” But the important part for us today is how he ends, “Yet not what I will, but what you will.” It’s an attitude of humility and submission. It says that we don’t know everything and despite our close relationship with God, we can’t always escape the harsh realities of life. We turn to God in those moments to give us strength. When Jesus tells Peter, “The spirit is willing, but the body is weak,” he’s talking as much to them as to himself. “Pray so that you will not fall into temptation.” Jesus knows this from personal experience, how easy it is to do what YOU want, to avoid the hard work, to turn inward instead of toward God. He knows the temptation of the here and now is far easier to turn toward than the distant promises of God, but God’s hope for your life and the life you are meant to lead are so much more important than the quick fix or the easy way out. Prayer is about the constant communication between us and God to align ourselves with his will. It’s why Paul writes in his letter to the church at Thessalonica, “16 Rejoice always, 17 pray continually, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” By keeping in constant communication, we can stick to the plan God wants to share with us.
Prayer is hard for some of us.
Even if we carve our time for it and are willing to do it, there are other hurdles in our prayer life. For some people, praying to God is like visiting the Pope. What if you say the wrong thing? What if the only prayer you know is “God is great, God is good, thank you God for this food?” And praying out loud? Forget it. I’ve told you this before, but praying out loud is one of my biggest fears about being a pastor. If I forget something in a sermon, only me and God know (and our worship team since I give them my manuscript in advance). But the Lord’s Prayer? Mess that one up and everyone knows. We put the words up on the screen. What’s worse? I think about it nearly every time I do it. So of course, when you lose your concentration, you’re that much more likely to mess up…which has happened before. Thankfully, since I warn people in advance that this is a fear of mine, people are usually gracious. Other fears are not knowing what to say or being afraid that your prayer isn’t good enough. But I’ll let you in on a little secret. God doesn’t care about any of that. He just wants you to pray. Eventually, you’ll figure it out for yourself.
Imagine if you have a child and your child just stopped talking to you.
How sad would you be? And they stopped talking to you for years and years. Maybe they pick up the phone once in a while or worse – send a text asking you for money. You send it, but your heart is breaking because it’s obvious you are an afterthought. You can’t force them to talk to you because you hope they WANT to talk to you, not because they feel some sort of obligation. So you wait. I imagine in the story of the prodigal son that this is why God throws a party. His child has chosen on his own to reconnect to his father. Praying doesn’t require anything special and if you do it long enough and with an open heart, you’ll get the hang of it. Eventually, you’ll find yourself talking to God in odd moments. In the car. Right before bed. Before you have to give a presentation. Or right before doing the Lord’s Prayer. “God don’t let me mess this up.” That’s what Paul meant when he said “pray continuously.” You don’t have to be on your knees every moment of the day. Instead, you find yourself simply making God a part of your life. This is the kind of prayer life God wants for you. Not to make God feel good, but to make your life better.
If you think of prayer like a list for Santa, you’ll be disappointed.
But if you look at prayer as a way to help you open up your life to where God is leading you, you’ll find a lifetime of amazement. Prayer opens us up for the work of the Holy Spirit. Prayer helps soothe our fears, and to develop eyes and ears for God. As Jesus taught us, the temptations of the world are numerous, and it is all too easy to be lead away from the life God has in store for you. But if we stay in contact with God through prayer, he can keep our lives on track. Prayer is a discipline and like anything else only gets better with practice. Just pray and let God know you’re there. There are tons of benefits to prayer. Good health, longer life, less stress. But the best reason to pray is to find out the peace and joy God has waiting for you.
[1] https://health.usnews.com/health-news/articles/2008/12/22/health-prayer-should-religion-and-faith-have-roles-in-medicine?PageNr=1
[2] https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/acts-of-faith/wp/2017/08/07/frustrated-with-your-spouse-these-scientists-suggest-a-specific-kind-of-prayer/?utm_term=.ac21e2cd0468
[3] Chris Tompkins, “The Power of Prayer,” Psychology Today, January 24, 2025, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lgbtq-affirmative-psychology/202501/the-power-of-prayer
Confident Humility
Confident or cocky?
They are not the same thing. I was reading an article by Michael Schein for Inc.com about the benefits of shameless self-promotion, and it made me mad.[1] While I agreed with half of his article, the other half was a recipe for all that is wrong in the world today. Never show doubt. Make enemies. Make people mad. Care at least as much about looks as about what you have to offer. Provoke people. Pull pranks. Generate hype however you can regardless of its effect. This is the perfect recipe for polarization. Does it work? Sure. But you need to ask yourself if success is worth sacrificing your morality, your honor, and your duty to caring for others. There are times when self-promotion is important and even essential. When you are trying to get a job or win over the girl of your dreams, you need to find a way to stand out, to differentiate yourself from the crowd. Putting your best foot forward, making sure they know what you have to offer is just the smart thing to do. But when it comes at the expense of others? That should be where we draw the line. It’s hard not to think about what Matthew wrote, “What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? (Matthew 16:26).
People often mistake being cocky for being confident.
When in fact cockiness is the opposite of confidence. Cocky people feel the need to put themselves on display all the time; to make sure people notice them, to get attention for themselves. They cover up their own deep insecurities with grandiose gestures and over-the-top attention-grabbing antics. They tell you all the time about how great they are and how they are so much better than everyone else. Shameless self-promotion. But if you are truly at the top of your game, you don’t need to do that. You find ways to lift up other people. You acknowledge you didn’t do it alone. Because a confident person is secure in themselves. They aren’t worried about sharing the limelight because they shine bright enough on their own. They don’t need the recognition of others to feel validated because they already know they are enough.
God wants you to be confident.
God wants you to know that you are enough; that he loves you for who you are and that you should love yourself as well. When Jesus told us that the second greatest commandment is to love your neighbor as yourself, there’s an implied assumption that we do, in fact, love ourselves. Not in a vain, conceited way but truly loving the person we are; being satisfied and secure in ourselves. That doesn’t mean we think we are perfect. Again, that would be vanity. Just that despite the work we need to do for ourselves, we know we are loved and valued. That’s the wonder of God’s creation! When you’re in sync with God and God’s will for your life, you have that peace about you that Paul calls the “peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7).” One of my favorite ways to describe it. “The peace that surpasses all understanding.” Who wouldn’t want that in their life? When you truly love yourself, you can’t help but feel confident because you know you’re good enough.
Cocky people are seeking validation elsewhere.
Instead of knowing they are enough, they look to others and compare themselves constantly to validate who they are. That seems to be one of the biggest differences between being cocky and being confident. Confident people look inward and cocky people look outward. In fact, the Bible gives us a great example of this in Matthew’s version of the Gospel. If you have a Bible or a Bible app on your phone would you please find Matthew 23:1-12. When this story happens, Jesus has been challenged relentlessly from the chief priests, the Pharisees, AND the Sadducees. If he were a basketball player, I would say he’s being triple-teamed in the low post! But like he normally does, Jesus is able to move and weave his way through and come out untouched. When he does he addresses the people who have borne witness to all of this and this is where we pick up in the story. If you would please rise as we share from the Gospel of Matthew 23:1-12. Hear now the Word of the Lord.
Then Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples: 2 “The teachers of the law and the Pharisees sit in Moses’ seat. 3 So you must be careful to do everything they tell you. But do not do what they do, for they do not practice what they preach. 4 They tie up heavy, cumbersome loads and put them on other people’s shoulders, but they themselves are not willing to lift a finger to move them.
5 “Everything they do is done for people to see: They make their phylacteries[a] wide and the tassels on their garments long; 6 they love the place of honor at banquets and the most important seats in the synagogues; 7 they love to be greeted with respect in the marketplaces and to be called ‘Rabbi’ by others.
8 “But you are not to be called ‘Rabbi,’ for you have one Teacher, and you are all brothers. 9 And do not call anyone on earth ‘father,’ for you have one Father, and he is in heaven. 10 Nor are you to be called instructors, for you have one Instructor, the Messiah. 11 The greatest among you will be your servant. 12 For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted. – Matthew 23:1-12
Jesus poses a threat to all of these religious leaders.
The chief priests, the Pharisees, and the Sadducees are insecure because they know from Scripture that one day a savior will come and they would rightfully lose their power. They should want this! If it happens it means the savior is amongst them! What an incredible honor to be witness to something so monumental! They should not just be willing but happy to give away their status to be in the presence of God. But they have defined their existence by the power they wield and they are so insecure without it. So instead of embracing Jesus, they do a full court press to discredit him. Jesus points out to the crowd that everything they do is for validation. They desire recognition. They want people to give them respect. They need to be called ‘Rabbi’ and take the seat of honor. Because they only feel good about themselves by lording their power over others. So, to lose it would mean losing themselves. It would be sad if they weren’t trying to kill Jesus. And that’s why Jesus offers that line of wisdom at the end, “For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”
That’s the thing about cocky people.
Or anyone who elevates themselves above others. Eventually, they get found out. Cocky people have a false sense of their own abilities.[2] They like to think they are better than they are and because of that, they tend to believe there is no need to improve. I mean, why improve upon perfection? And eventually they become humbled. You’re probably saying to yourself you know plenty of cocky people who never seem to be humbled and you’re right. But they are often humbled in the eyes of others. People turn their backs on them. They finally see through the hype and bravado. And so, without even realizing it they lose influence on those around them. Confident people, on the other hand, are often humble. Which probably doesn’t make sense on the surface, but the confidence they possess gives them the security to be vulnerable, to lift others up. They don’t need to take credit for achievements. They don’t need the accolades to feel good about themselves. Instead, they share the praise and credit with others because they are know they are enough.
Ultimately, it’s the difference between being broken and being made whole.
You know the saying, “Hurt people hurt people?” I’ve been hearing that a lot lately and I think it is God’s not so subtle way of saying we need to explore this together. Cocky people are hurt people. Vain and arrogant people are hurt people. They are seeking validation from others because they don’t feel it within. And the way they feel better about themselves is by comparing themselves to others. Someone who is proud or cocky says, “I did this.” Someone who is confident and humble says, “I’m glad to be a part of this.” God wants us to be confident, not cocky. We need to work on ourselves to make sure we don’t slip from one to the other. The key is to “adopt a growth mindset.”[3] To be open to the possibility you are not perfect. To be willing to constantly improve your knowledge and be open to new ideas. If you acknowledge you have a way to go to be better, you find yourself more humble and more willing to listen to others and that will help give you the right mindset that God wants for us all. We can make the world a better place, but it starts with each one of us. Let us always stay true to the people God wants us to be.
[1] Michael Shein, “A Little Shameless Self-Promotion Can Be a Good Thing – as Long as You Follow These 10 Rules,” Inc.com, Jan 24, 2018, https://www.inc.com/michael-schein/the-10-commandments-of-shameless-self-promotio.html
[2] Enya Eettickal, “Cocky or Confident?” The Case Western Reserve Observer, February 17, 2023, https://observer.case.edu/cocky-or-confident/
[3] “#1 Confidence Imposter: Cocky,” American Confidence Institute, Accessed on May 15, 2026, https://www.americanconfidenceinstitute.com/blog/confidence-imposter-cocky
Multiple Choice Christianity
When was the last time you tried to argue your way out of trouble?
Growing up I was a big fan of the Brady Bunch, probably because I had an equally big crush on Marcia. There were lots of memorable episodes. Peter’s voice changing. Bobby running away. The mystery of Kitty Karry-All (whatever happened to Tiger anyway?). So many memories. One lesson that stuck with me from the show was in an episode called “Greg Gets Grounded.” Oldest son Greg nearly crashes the family station wagon because he’s reading the jacket cover of his new album while driving and ends up getting grounded from using the car for a week. But Greg, who has a big date that weekend finds a loophole and borrows a friend’s car instead. As usual, Mr. and Mrs. Brady find out, but Greg argues with his dad and says, “I didn’t disobey you. Your exact words were that I couldn’t drive OUR car, but you didn’t say anything about driving someone else’s car.” Mr. Brady says, “Greg, you knew what we meant when we grounded you.” But Greg argues, “Yeah, but Dad those weren’t your EXACT words.” Mr. Brady, in a very sly move, decides to let Greg off the hook by instead making his son live by “his exact words.” Needless to say, after doing chores at 11:00 at night, Greg finds out VERY quickly that living by the letter of the law isn’t all it’s cracked up to be and admits he was wrong.
Living by “exact words” isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
And like Greg, we use it as an excuse for not doing the right thing. A very sad and tragic story happened about a nurse in Bakersfield all the way back in 2013 but one that drives this point home. Colleen, a nurse in Bakersfield, used the excuse to sit by while an elderly woman died.[1] Literally sat by and watched while a woman was dying on the dining room floor of a senior living complex. Apparently, an 87-year old woman named Lorraine Bayless collapsed to the ground and Colleen called 911 to get help. The operator, realizing the seriousness of the situation, told the nurse that someone needed to administer CPR to Ms. Bayless and the nurse refused citing company policy as her excuse. The operator pleaded with Colleen to do it to save her life and if not her, then to hand the phone to someone who might. Colleen refused. Literally refused. But perhaps the most disturbing part of the call was when the 911 operator asked her, “Is there anyone that’s willing to help this lady and not let her die?” And in what seemed to be a very cold and callous reaction, the nurse said, “Um, not at this time.”[2] Her adherence to the “rules” was so great that she allowed a fellow human being to die right in front of her without so much as lifting a finger beyond calling 911. What’s worse she was a nurse and still refused to do anything because of the “rules.” She wouldn’t even pass the phone to someone else or look for someone who might be willing to do what she wouldn’t and Lorraine died.
Was she following the spirit of those “exact words?”
Too often our “exact words” become weapons or shields against others, but this isn’t their intent. The intent of the law and the intent of rules are to lay down a guideline to better living. But they are NOT meant to be used as instruments or tools to harm others. Yet throughout our history, we have done exactly that – we have used the law as a means to an end instead of adhering to the spirit in which it was made. We hear about one such case in our reading of the Bible today. This will probably be a very familiar story if you’ve been in church for a while. It’s often referred to as the story of the adulterous woman, but that isn’t really fair to her. It should be called “The Pharisees are at it again,” but I guess that happens so much they need to differentiate it somehow. Once again, they try to trip Jesus up – trying to get him to contradict the Word of God so they have a reason to get rid of him. And this isn’t the only time they do this. At various points in the Gospels they try to trap Jesus with their clever questions and arguments. And this time is no different. In this passage they question Jesus about this woman who commits adultery and this is where we pick up in the Gospel narrative.
2 At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. 3 The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group 4 and said to Jesus, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. 5 In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?” 6 They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.
But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. 7 When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” 8 Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.
9 At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. 10 Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?”
11 “No one, sir,” she said.
“Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.” – John 8:2-11
Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.
Jesus didn’t sidestep the law. He didn’t contradict the law. Instead he improved upon the law and said, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” And they were stuck. None of them qualified and they knew it. They were hoping Jesus would say something they could hang him on, something that showed he really was either a heretic or a lunatic, but instead Jesus turns the tables on them. He doesn’t deny that this woman broke their laws and customs, but instead says in his own way that only someone who is sinless has the right to stand in judgment and if a sinless person was found who thought she deserved this punishment then it would be justified. Ironically, Jesus is the only sinless person. So one by one, they go away and Jesus instead of seeking justice offers mercy. “Neither do I condemn you,” he tells the woman, “Go now and leave your life of sin.”
Jesus had every right to throw the book at her.
Or a stone. She violated the law and the law demanded punishment. But as the only one worthy of issuing that punishment, Jesus chose instead the path of love and grace and mercy. As it says in Hosea 6:6 and again in Matthew, “For I desire mercy, not sacrifice, and acknowledgement of God rather than burnt offerings.” This is the kind of God we worship. One who is more interested in grace than condemnation, hope instead of harm. He makes it really easy to understand, too. Love God, love your neighbor. Very simple rules. And we twist those rules and use them as a battering ram against people who don’t believe exactly what we believe.
In the past, the Bible has been misused to justify offenses of the worst kind.
It’s been used as a tool to justify racism, sexism, spousal abuse, homophobia, destruction of the environment, destruction of basic freedoms, and other horrific tragedies, and yet it is clear by simply reading the Bible that God wishes for none of these things. They are inconsistent with everything we know about God. So how do they justify it? They engage in Multiple Choice Christianity. They pick and choose what parts of the Bible they like to fit their beliefs. You take a passage from column A and a passage from column B and you come up with some derivation of Scripture that suits your needs. But as H.G. Wells once said, “Satan delights equally in statistics and quoting Scripture.”[3] Because like statistics, you can shape and bend Scripture to say almost anything when you choose to ignore the facts. God doesn’t make it hard to understand and yet too often Christians have done a good job of twisting the message and life of Christ into a pretzel. But the message is simple: love God, love others. Love God, love others. This is the greatest commandment and as Jesus said, all the rest rely on these two things.
When I first moved to Georgia, I had a hard time finding my way around.
Everything was named “Peachtree.” You’d think they could come up with some original names for streets. There was Peachtree Ave, Peachtree Street, Peachtree Circle, Peachtree Battle (I don’t know how you end up naming a street Peachtree “Battle”), Peachtree Road, Peachtree Blvd, Peachtree Industrial Pkwy, and that’s just to name a few. Needless to say I needed a map. I didn’t have a GPS and so I was often driving around the city with one eye on the road and one eye on my map. Well, I guess this particular day my one eye missed the streetlight that was red. There were these two stoplights in a row and the first one was green and the second one, only a little farther away was red. And I just went right through that second light. Completely oblivious, I kept driving and out of my rear-view mirror, I see this police car with its lights on. I pull over like a good driver, not wanting to cause any trouble, and the policeman pulls over with me. I’m totally shocked. That is until the officer comes up and says to me, “Did you notice that you ran through a red light?” I told him, “No, sir. I didn’t see it.” I look back and sure enough there was a second light. I felt doomed. Not even a week in my new city and already in trouble with the law. But then the officer did something completely unexpected. He said, “You’re new around here, aren’t you?” I nodded. “Well, next time be extra careful. That light can be pretty hard to see. Welcome to Georgia. Have a nice day.” Grace is much more powerful than the law. It has an effect that goes far beyond the moment. Remember, it isn’t about adhering to “exact words.” It’s all about doing the right thing. So do the right thing. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
[1] http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/headlines/2013/03/elderly-woman-dies-after-nurse-refuses-to-give-her-cpr/
[2] http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013/03/04/partial-transcript-11-call-from-calif-senior-living-facility-where-woman-died/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+foxnews%2Fnational+%28Internal+-+US+Latest+-+Text%29
Gold, Silver, Bronze
Sometimes a race is simply too close to call.
Back in 2016, I was watching the Olympics, and I remember thinking we need new standards on who wins and who doesn’t. When Katie Ledecky won the 800m freestyle by nearly 12 seconds she obviously deserved the gold medal. Maybe two. But on the other end of the spectrum, you’ve got Mahe Drysdale of New Zealand winning the men’s single scull rowing competition over Damir Martin by one-one-thousandth of a second![1] One-one-thousandth of a second! The official time for both rowers was exactly the same on the official clock, so they had to go to a photo and Drysdale literally won by a centimeter. A centimeter! Drysdale set a new Olympic record, and Martin went home with the silver. Somehow seems unfair. Without computers, they certainly would have called it a tie, and both men deservedly would go home with the gold, and no one would have complained. But now, Drysdale is a gold medalist and Martin is not. Jerry Seinfeld had a great comedy routine about the silver medal. He said, “I think I’d rather come in last than win the silver. You win the gold, you feel good. You win the bronze, you think, ‘Well at least I won something.’ You win the silver it’s like, ‘Congratulations! You…almost won. Of all the losers, you came in first of that group. You’re the number one loser. No one lost ahead of you.’” You had to feel for Damir Martin. To lose by such a small margin he must have been thinking, “If I had done ANYTHING different, I could have won! Maybe I shouldn’t have eaten that donut.” I’m sure he didn’t eat a donut before the race, but you get it. Still, our culture is obsessed with winning. We keep coming up with new technology to make sure we know. No more ties in competition. There has to be a winner. But why? When it is THAT close, so close we can’t tell with the human eye, why do we insist on declaring a winner?
The answer is simple: We like feeling superior.
We find value in comparing ourselves to others, and maybe that’s the real problem. Not being enough on our own. President Teddy Roosevelt once called comparison “the thief of joy” and it certainly can be.[2] Do you like yourself? Or do you constantly find yourself comparing your life to those around you? It’s one of the real drawbacks of social media because you’re comparing yourself to a false reality. Here’s a weird statistic for you, “for every selfie we see, around 10 attempts at that selfie have been made.”[3] Anyone can make life look good in ten second segments. It’s not like when I was growing up and you had to literally pay for every photo you took. You couldn’t check it immediately to see if it turned out good. Nope. You had to pay for that little gem, and the moment was long over before you found out that it was completely out of focus. But even without social media, when we define ourselves by those around us, it can be unhealthy. Basically, there are two types of comparison – upward and downward – and they are likely what you’d expect.
Upward comparison is when we look at others who we perceive to be doing better than us. In moderation it might inspire us to do better or work harder, but it can also lead to increased anxiety and stress, low self-esteem and depression, burnout, and dissatisfaction with life.[4] For today though, we are going to focus on the other one, the one that doesn’t get talked about as much – downward comparison. Downward comparison is when we look at someone else who we perceive to be doing worse than us or behaving more badly than we are and taking satisfaction from being “better than them.” This kind of comparison might make you feel grateful for the life you have, but it can also give you a false sense of superiority and make you less empathic to those around you.[5] And that’s where our half-truth for the day comes in. “Love the sinner. Hate the sin.” On the surface it sounds all well and good right? God tells us many times we need to love one another, so this seems like a reminder to separate the person from the act. Well, if that’s all it was then maybe it would be okay, but in reality, when we actually SAY these words we are doing exactly what the Pharisee is doing in our passage today.
9 To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable: 10 “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11 The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’
13 “But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’
14 “I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.” – Luke 18:9-14
At least I’m not like him.
Have you ever caught yourself thinking something like that? You hear about someone in the news who was caught stealing, or cheating, or hurting someone and there’s a part of you, a part you probably don’t even say out loud that whispers, “Well, at least I’m not like him.” And that’s what is going on in this story. These two guys are going up to the temple to pray, and the Pharisee makes sure to keep his distance. He doesn’t want to be seen with a TAX COLLECTOR (insert your preferred most hated profession here). The Pharisee stands apart from him and prays this prayer: “God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.” Amen. The Pharisee doesn’t admit to any wrongdoing. He doesn’t confess to any sins. He simply says, “at least I’m better than THIS guy.” Meanwhile, the tax collector, who probably feels unworthy to even be in the temple, simply asks for forgiveness, and Jesus said that it was the tax collector God was pleased with. Sure, the Pharisee followed the rules. He fasted. He gave his tithe. But he did it as much for himself as for God. The tax collector had humility in his heart and that’s who God was pleased with.
Pride is what gets between us and God.
That’s what was wrong with the Pharisee. His pride. “At least I’m not as bad as THAT guy.” It’s that arrogance, that judgmental attitude, to dare to elevate yourself above others that did him in. When we compare ourselves to others like that, it’s an attempt on our part to mitigate our own sin, our own faults, to say that even though I know I’m not perfect, there are other people much worse than I am out there God so you should be happy with me. But God doesn’t care about that. God cares about YOU. That’s why in Romans it says, “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” Because it doesn’t matter if you’re a little better or a lot better than the next guy. God’s concern is with YOU. God is concerned about YOUR heart. As Jesus said earlier, we need to take the plank out of our own eye before worrying about the speck in our brother’s eye (Matthew 7:3-5). So when we say, “Love the sinner, hate the sin,” we presume that the OTHER person is the sinner. It’s the OTHER person who needs some help. Not us. In his book Half Truth, Adam Hamilton says, “When ‘Love the sinner’ is our mantra, we’ve put ourselves in a position of seeing others as sinners rather than neighbors…I think what turns people off is when religious people point out the sins of others but act as though they have no sins of their own.”[6] We might admit to having sins, but there is this air about us when we start acting judgmental of others that somehow our sins are not as bad as someone else’s.
We make the mistake of thinking that life is a zero-sum game.
And that at the end of it, some of us are going to Heaven and some of us are not and all we have to do is finish ahead of the other guy to get there. I think about this a lot when I’m watching the Great British Baking Show. You don’t have to win Star Baker every week to win the whole thing. You really only have to win it once – at the end. The rest of the time you just have to finish ahead of the other guy to make it. I think we approach life like that at times. It’s why we don’t take how we behave and how we care about others more seriously. It’s the thought that if I do enough good deeds, I’ll make it. I don’t really have to believe in anything. I don’t really have to read the Bible. I don’t really have to go to church. I just have to prove that I’m better than the next guy and I’ll get into Heaven. And that’s what is dangerous. As soon as we do that, as soon as we start comparing ourselves to one another, we lower the bar. We keep playing for the minimum amount of effort. We sleep soundly at night not because we’ve done a stellar job of loving our neighbor but because we turn on the news and at least half of those people are way worse than us. But that isn’t how God expects us to behave and we dishonor God by comparing ourselves to each other. The biggest mistake we make is assuming life is a zero-sum game. God’s intention, his desire, is for everyone to come to him. In 2 Peter 3:9, Peter tells us, “The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.” Remember that. God doesn’t care about how you compare. What he DOES care about that no medal or prize or award can ever give is the goodness in your heart. That isn’t something you can measure against other people. It’s something that is between you and God.
Hamilton tells a great story about how we SHOULD act toward one another.
He wrote, “Some time ago I read an interview with Billy Graham’s eldest daughter, Gigi. She was her father’s date to Time magazine’s seventy-fifth anniversary party, a banquet in Washington, DC. President Bill Clinton spoke at the event. He had just been impeached by the House of Representatives for perjury and obstruction of justice. The charge of perjury involved what President Clinton had said, under oath, about his relationship with White House intern Monica Lewinsky. At the banquet, her father sat with President and Mrs. Clinton. He was warm and gracious to them. After the dinner ended and Graham and Gigi were riding back to their hotel, the two discussed difficulties the president and First Lady were going through with so many people gossiping and judging. Gigi said her father’s simple comment was, ‘It’s the Holy Spirit’s job to convict; it’s God’s job to judge; and it’s our job to love.’”[7] A simple but powerful reminder of what we were created to do. Matthew 22: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’[a] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”
[1] https://www.buzzfeed.com/carolinekee/rio-close-finish?utm_term=.ma4495g4p#.heXbn3Db4
[2] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/social-comparison-theory
[3] https://www.stylist.co.uk/life/comparing-ourselves-to-others-comparison-culture-research-self-esteem-instagram-social-media-success-careers-fitness-relationships/345725
[4] https://www.desertwillowbh.com/blog/the-danger-of-comparison-how-measuring-your-success-against-others-affects-mental-health and also https://www.calm.com/blog/social-comparison-theory
[5] https://www.calm.com/blog/social-comparison-theory
[6] Adam Hamilton, Half Truths, p. 153.
[7] Ibid, p.159.
Help Wanted!
“I know I’m about to win! I’m so close!”
In the back of mind, I can still hear myself saying those words as my friends Lance, Gene, Murali, and Rich dragged me away from the video poker machines in Tahoe. It was the first time I’d ever gone into a casino. I’d played penny poker with my friends before, but this was real money and it was exciting! The first time I won and heard those coins clinking into the tray made my heart race as the prospect of suddenly becoming rich seemed so close. How easy it all seemed to be! Pretty soon I went from playing one nickel to five without realizing it. Soon, money was bleeding from my pockets. I had planned to spend only $20 on gambling and already I had spent twice that, but I KNEW that big jackpot was right around the corner! I KNEW IT!!! Now, I was betting with food money. But before I started thinking about selling my clothes to the pawn shop, my friends came over and pulled me away. “Dude, forget about it. Let’s go.” “But I’m so CLOSE.” I actually said those words. “I’m SO CLOSE!” “You can’t win dude (remember this was the ‘80s – there were a lot of ‘dudes’). It’s set up for you to lose.” “But I know I’m going to win big!” My friends told me they were leaving and they had the car so I had to go, but it was so hard to leave that seat. I realized later how I had been blinded by the allure of BIG MONEY! Yes, even from a nickel video poker machine. If it hadn’t been for my friends, I might have starved the rest of the trip. I needed them without even realizing it.
Sometimes life is like that. We need more help than we realize.
We get caught up in the middle of something and we get lost in it. Or we find ourselves in a situation we think we can handle but pretty soon you’re overwhelmed like an ocean wave capturing you by surprise. Have you ever felt that? That feeling of being at the mercy of something you can’t even see. The first time a wave caught me by surprise, I was sure I could handle it, but the tide was much stronger than I thought and pretty soon I’m tumbling head over heels. I tried to put my feet down in the sand, but literally couldn’t tell which way was up. It was scary. We get caught in situations like that, thankfully not too often. Situations that creep up on us before we even know it. The sudden death of a loved one. A relationship coming to an end. A scary diagnosis from the doctor. And about the worst thing you can say in those moments? “God doesn’t give you more than you can handle.”
I know it’s said with the best of intentions.
Someone, probably someone you love, is trying to give you hope and letting you know that you’ll get through this okay. But will you? What happens if you don’t get through this okay? Is that your fault? Like the phrase “Everything happens for a reason,” this one is fraught with many of the same problems. It implies God DID this, whatever this is. God did this TO YOU. God gave you this problem, this tragedy, this situation. Just because God thinks you can handle it? Whether we can handle it or not, we would rightly question a cruel God who would make us go through pain and suffering JUST because “we can handle it.” And the truth is, not everyone can. According to the World Health Organization over 700,000 people commit suicide every year. If God doesn’t give us more than we can handle, then why are there people who can’t handle it? Even pastors aren’t immune. In a study of Protestant pastors from the Barna Group, they found nearly 1 in 5 have at least had thoughts of suicide or self-harm in the past year. One in 10 had at least occasional thoughts of it and thankfully only 1% were severe. Not even pastors are immune.
So where does this idea come from?
Like many false beliefs it comes from the Bible. Or to be more precise a bad interpretation of the Bible. We’re going to read this morning from 1 Corinthians 10:1-13 so if you have a Bible or a Bible app with you, this is Paul’s letter to the church at Corinth in the New Testament. 1 Corinthians 10:1-13. It started with Job. In Job, God allows Satan to tempt Job away from his faith in God but to no avail. Despite the numerous tragedies that are heaped upon Job, Job remains God’s faithful servant. But what most people don’t know is that the Book of Job is not a true story. This isn’t meant to be historical literature like 1 and 2 Kings or the Gospel of Luke. Instead it’s meant to convey an idea about God through story. The Book of Job is more akin to an expanded Aesop fable than it is to the historical literature. But because most people don’t know that they treat Job as if it happened word for word. And it becomes this ultimate example of God not giving us more than we can handle. But it’s just not true. The story is meant to show us the power of faith through difficult times and how faith in God and trust in God can give us strength. It’s not meant to say we will never be overwhelmed with what happens to us in life. We can’t all be Job, nor are we supposed to be. In the same way, this passage from 1 Corinthians is meant to encourage us in times of difficulty but it’s been taken to mean the same thing, “God doesn’t give us more than we can handle.” If you would please rise as you’re able, we are going to read this morning from 1 Corinthians 10:1-13. Hear now the Word of God.
For I do not want you to be ignorant of the fact, brothers and sisters, that our ancestors were all under the cloud and that they all passed through the sea. 2 They were all baptized into Moses in the cloud and in the sea. 3 They all ate the same spiritual food 4 and drank the same spiritual drink; for they drank from the spiritual rock that accompanied them, and that rock was Christ. 5 Nevertheless, God was not pleased with most of them; their bodies were scattered in the wilderness.
6 Now these things occurred as examples to keep us from setting our hearts on evil things as they did. 7 Do not be idolaters, as some of them were; as it is written: “The people sat down to eat and drink and got up to indulge in revelry.” 8 We should not commit sexual immorality, as some of them did—and in one day twenty-three thousand of them died. 9 We should not test Christ, as some of them did—and were killed by snakes. 10 And do not grumble, as some of them did—and were killed by the destroying angel.
11 These things happened to them as examples and were written down as warnings for us, on whom the culmination of the ages has come. 12 So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall! 13 No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it. – 1 Corinthians 10:1-13
“He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.”
That’s the troubling line. “He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.” That’s where we get this idea that God doesn’t give us more than we can handle, but the differences here are subtle and significant and that’s why I wanted to read the whole passage to you. When you read it in its entirety, you get a clearer picture of what’s happening. In the church at Corinth, they weren’t struck with some catastrophe and now Paul is writing to them with words of condolence. They weren’t going through a time of difficulty and Paul is trying to give them hope. It’s the people willfully walking away from God for the next best thing. They are being tempted to walk away from their faith, and Paul is comparing that to what happened in the past to the people of Israel. The people of Israel were tempted by the next shiny object like New Age crystals or numerology and turned to those things instead of God. The people of Israel saw other religions who offered them promises that seemed more appealing like prosperity preachers today who tell you if you only have enough faith then you will be rich here on this earth. That’s the kind of temptation Paul is saying is not more than we can bear. Paul is reminding them not to fall prey to hucksters and scam artists and false prophets who are trying to lead them away from God. This isn’t a commentary by Paul about tragedy and hardship. Because Paul knows about tragedy and hardship. He even gives a list of them in the Bible including being whipped five times, beaten with rods, stoned, imprisoned, shipwrecked three times! Cold, naked, hungry and thirsty. Paul has seen it all. But this warning we are reading isn’t about God not giving you more than you can handle. It’s a plea for the church to keep their faith and to turn to God in our troubles.
God is waiting for us to put out a “Help Wanted” sign on our lives.
To acknowledge that we can’t do it alone. God stands ready to help, to offer us solutions, to give us alternatives, to put people in our lives who can support and guide us – but we still have to acknowledge we need it. In his book Half Truths, Adam Hamilton writes, “The promise of Scripture is not that we won’t go through hard times…What Scripture does promise is that at all times, good or bad, God wants to be our help and our strength.” That’s the key. We WILL go through hard times. There will be times when its more than we can bear. But we don’t have to make that journey alone. If you haven’t made the decision to turn your life over to God or if its something you’ve been struggling with, I want to encourage you to do so. To be open to the possibility that there is a God in Heaven who really does want to help. That his help may come in ways you are not expecting. A friendly voice, a kind gesture, a mysterious note, or even an email. I’ve found that in each instance where I truly surrendered myself to God, something has happened. It’s not always what I expected (in fact it almost never is), but something happens and I know that God’s hand was in it. God doesn’t test us in the way we often think. I don’t think God sets up situations to see if we are faithful. I think things happen to us and God hopes that instead of turning to something else we seek his guidance and his help. Like I said, it may not always turn out the way we want, but if we are willing to go down the path God is taking us it can often be better than we imagine. In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
Que Sera Sera
“Everything happens for a reason.”
You’ve probably heard that saying before. You might even believe it. It’s kind of the “go to” quip people use when they don’t know what to say when something sad or tragic occurs. “Everything happens for a reason.” I guess we hope it’s true because then it makes sense of something awful, as if there was a purpose to why it happened. It gives us comfort to think whatever happened wasn’t pointless. We use other sayings, too. “It was meant to be.” “It was his time.” But does everything really happen for a reason? And what does that mean if it does? Whenever we use superlatives like “everything” and “always” we should be prepared to have an ounce of skepticism. As you probably already know, rarely is anything that definitive. The same is true for this. Not everything happens for a reason.
Well-meaning Christians have been popping out sayings like this for a long time.
But it isn’t grounded in anything that makes sense. It might seem comforting on the surface, but when you think about it, it just doesn’t hold water. When we tell someone “Everything happens for a reason,” we’re essentially saying God caused it to happen. That it was God that caused them to die or to suffer or go through some unimaginable pain. When I was in high school, my high school chemistry teacher, Mr. McNally, died in a tragic car accident. He was hit by a drunk driver and thankfully his son survived the crash. But Mr. McNally died. His life was suddenly over. A much beloved teacher who had inspired many of his students was ripped away from his family, his friends, and his students in a moment. The drunk driver however, not only survived but walked away from the accident. It just made no sense, especially to a bunch of 10th graders. And in those instances people rely on tropes and quips and easy pithy statements so they don’t have to answer the tough questions. “Everything happens for a reason.” But you have to ask yourself, is that really true? Did we all have to suffer and lose a good person who made the world brighter in service to some grand plan? Or was this just some irresponsible idiot who got behind the wheel when he shouldn’t have?
How we understand the answer to that makes all the difference in the world.
When we say “Everything happens for a reason,” we’re really saying God controls our actions and that poses two problems – our responsibility and God’s responsibility. Saying God controls everything poses two problems – our responsibility and God’s responsibility. We have none and God has it all. Adam Hamilton, in his book Half Truth, wrote “If I drink and drive and someone is killed as a result, it must have been the victim’s ‘time.’ Yes, I did a terrible thing, but the devil didn’t make me do it. Instead, God used me to accomplish some greater purpose. I cannot be held responsible for my actions. I was only doing what God willed me to do.”[1] And if we really believe everything happens for a reason, we believe this to be true. We are only carrying out God’s will no matter how hurtful, how obscene, or how violent it may be. Hitler? God’s fault. Terrorism? God’s fault. Cancer? God’s fault. It’s all God’s fault. Which makes the problem of “Everything happens for a reason” clear – it’s all God’s fault. Every horrible thing, every horrible person, every horrible choice that happens in the world is God’s fault and since we have absolutely no responsibility, why worry about it? Why stress over what we should do next? After all it isn’t OUR fault. It’s what I like to call the “Que Sera Sera” philosophy – whatever will be, will be so it’s not my problem and it’s not my fault.
But is that true?
Seems like a horrible way to create the world. If human beings have no agency, no freedom, then aren’t we all just puppets dancing around for God’s enjoyment? And is that any way to live? Some people do believe we have very little control, if any, over our actions. It’s a theology called Calvinism or Reformed Christianity and it says God has already decided everything that will ever happen in the history of the world. As Hamilton points out, John Calvin, whom the movement was named after, believed that since God was completely sovereign then “Absolutely everything… happens by God’s will and command.”[2] “If something happens that is not God’s will…then God does not in fact have dominion over everything,” and that would run counter to Calvin’s beliefs.[3] In Calvin’s point of view, human beings really are merely puppets of God who’s every action is caused by God. Your breathing at this very moment is caused by God. God didn’t merely make it possible; he coordinated and orchestrated it. And if Calvin is right, then everything does happen for a reason.
As Methodists, we don’t believe this to be true.
We believe in free will. We believe God allows us to choose our path. We believe God created us not to be puppets but to be free creatures. I always think of this bookmark I had as a kid that said, “If you love something set it free. If it comes back to you, it’s yours. If it doesn’t it was never yours to begin with.” It’s an idiom, but within every idiom is a kernel of truth. God sets us free because he hopes we will come to him of our own free will. He wants us to CHOOSE him, because can you say it’s love if there is no free will? Is there love without a choice?
11 Now what I am commanding you today is not too difficult for you or beyond your reach. 12 It is not up in heaven, so that you have to ask, “Who will ascend into heaven to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?” 13 Nor is it beyond the sea, so that you have to ask, “Who will cross the sea to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?” 14 No, the word is very near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart so you may obey it.
15 See, I set before you today life and prosperity, death and destruction. 16 For I command you today to love the Lord your God, to walk in obedience to him, and to keep his commands, decrees and laws; then you will live and increase, and the Lord your God will bless you in the land you are entering to possess.
17 But if your heart turns away and you are not obedient, and if you are drawn away to bow down to other gods and worship them, 18 I declare to you this day that you will certainly be destroyed. You will not live long in the land you are crossing the Jordan to enter and possess.
19 This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live 20 and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. – Deuteronomy 30:11-20
There are tons of Scriptures like this.
Ones that make it clear we have a choice. Here, Moses is speaking to the people of Israel. He’s just got done talking to them about God’s covenant and tells them God stands ready to offer them his blessing if they simply turn to him. They can choose to follow their own way, but it will be one filled with pain and suffering, and while Moses couches it in terms of God’s wrath, I think we’ve come to understand that it’s not so much God’s wrath as it is the natural consequence of living without God in your life. But it’s a choice! Joshua tells the people of Israel in another time, “15 But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord. (Joshua 24:15).” Again, a choice. And God offers that choice over and over and over again. God never gives up on us, but he never forces us to follow him.
Because choice matters.
We are not helpless. We are not puppets. We are beings created in the image of God and God has offered and continues to offer us a chance to make the world better. I like what Adam Hamilton said. He wrote, “God gave us a brain, a heart, a conscience, his Spirit, the Scriptures, and the ability to interpret them as guides to help us select the right path.”[4] But ultimately the choice is up to us. God equips us with what we need, but we still get to choose and ultimately live with the consequences of our choices. Mr. McNally died when I was only 16 years old. I never knew back then where my life would lead me today. I don’t believe God caused Mr. McNally to be killed by a drunk driver, but I do believe God used this tragedy in my life to help me better understand the consequences of the choices we make and now I get to share that story with you. God doesn’t cause the calamities in our life, but he can bring blessing out of the deepest pain. Does everything happen for a reason? No, but that doesn’t mean God can’t open the world to you and through you to serve a higher purpose if we let him. But that choice is up to you. In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
[1] Adam Hamilton, Half Truths, p. 20
[2] Ibid, p.26.
[3] Ibid, p.26.
[4] Ibid, p.37.
Teacups of My Youth
Do you ever wish you could go back in time?
Sometimes I miss things I used to be able to do. It doesn’t seem all that long ago where riding the teacups at Disneyland was fun instead of nauseating. It was always a contest to see how fast I could make it spin. Emma would yell, “Faster, Daddy! Faster!” And it seemed as if the teacup would spin right off its mooring and fly us up into the air! To see the pure joy on her face and hear her laughter as we went round and round was so much fun. Those days are long gone. I still remember the day I knew it was over. We spun faster and faster like we always had, but suddenly I felt dizzy. Too dizzy to keep spinning. When the ride was over, it felt like only half of me got off. The other half had spun off to some far distant corner of the universe. I felt AWFUL! My head hurt, my stomach was nauseous; I had to sit down for a full half hour before I could move. It took me two hours to go on another ride. As I get older, the list of things I can no longer do just keeps growing longer. In 2017, my buddy John and I spent the entire night camping out for the D23 Expo so we could be among the first to get into the convention. We sat on the hard, cold cement floor for hours on end and the next morning we sprinted into the hall. Nowadays, what hotel we stay at depends largely on if the quality of the mattress. And one of the saddest effects of growing older is not getting to eat as much of that delicious Tommy’s hamburgers chili as I used to. If my mom is any kind of barometer, eventually I’ll have to give that up, too. Going back in time sees mighty appealing.
Most of us probably wish for that from time to time.
Maybe not about spinning teacups or Tommy’s chili, but about things going back to the way they were. It would be great if we could take the benefits of the life we have now, all the knowledge and appreciation of life we have grown to have, and somehow still have things the way they used to be, whether that’s being able to eat what we want or do what we want or have the endurance we used to have. The danger is when we allow our past to dictate our future. Sometimes we get so fixated on “what used to be” we miss opportunities right in front of us. Nancy McKittrick was a wonderful woman who was part of the church I served down in Dinuba about a decade ago. She and I were having a discussion after Easter worship, and she told me about this Upper Room devotional she had just read that opened her eyes to a new idea. It said often when we think of the resurrection of Christ, we think about Christ being restored. But restoration means being repaired or fixed the way you used to be and that’s not what happened to Jesus or any of his followers. When Christ came back, he was transformed, not restored. He wasn’t the same old Jesus who used to hang with the disciples, sharing stories, giving wise advice and teaching universal truths. He had conquered death and had come back to life! There was a fundamental difference in who Jesus was from that point on. If anyone doubted Jesus was the true Son of God, this convinced them otherwise. Who else could bring themselves back from the dead? The truth is the resurrection of Christ was about transformation not restoration. That’s what Jesus wanted for his disciples, what Jesus wanted for the world, and what Jesus wants for us – to be transformed into someone new.
But often we resist.
We like our old selves, and we like our old ways. We resist because we are used to being the way we are, and we can’t imagine what life would be like if it were different. Truth is we are a little bit scared about who this “new self” would be like. Even though we know in our hearts that God wants something even better for us! Still, we resist. And even as we go through changes in our life naturally, as we get older and our bodies change, we sometimes pine for the way we were. We look back on what we used to do and what we used to look like instead of embracing who we are and where we are going. In our reading this morning, Jesus is heading to Jerusalem and on the road, he encounters these three men. All three of them agree to follow Jesus, but he says different things to each one and that’s the conversation we are going to listen in on this morning.
57 As they were walking along the road, a man said to him, “I will follow you wherever you go.”
58 Jesus replied, “Foxes have dens and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.”
59 He said to another man, “Follow me.” But he replied, “Lord, first let me go and bury my father.”
60 Jesus said to him, “Let the dead bury their own dead, but you go and proclaim the kingdom of God.”
61 Still another said, “I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say goodbye to my family.”
62 Jesus replied, “No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.”first let me go back and say goodbye to my family.” – Luke 9:57-62
Focus is key.
When doing something important it’s necessary to avoid being distracted by things that might pull you off course. You need to concentrate on what’s ahead of you. If you’re on the operating table, you wouldn’t want a surgeon getting distracted when they have a knife inside of you. A baseball player needs to tune out the crowds, the noise, the jeering of the other team and concentrate on exactly what they are doing so they don’t miss that small window of opportunity when the ball comes whizzing by. Another job that requires concentration? Plowing a field. Even today with all the technology available, it’s important to keep focused on the job at hand. If you don’t, it can affect the soil which can impact your harvest which can impact your livelihood. If you’re looking back or looking around, you could end up ruining your field. That’s why Jesus tells this last guy “No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.” It might seem Jesus is being harsh, but in Luke’s storytelling he is trying to emphasize a particular point – if we want the future God promises, we can’t be tied down to the past. A boat with its anchor in the water isn’t likely to move very far.
You have to want it.
You have to want the life Jesus has planned for you. I know you can’t see it because none of us can, but God has a better life in store for you the closer you walk with him through this life. But he isn’t going to force you because then it isn’t a life you chose. It has to be something you’re willing to do on your own. One of the explanations I studied about this passage is the idea that these last two men were politely finding an excuse not to go on this journey. This first one said he needed to bury his father, which in some Jewish traditions could take up to a year. It certainly wouldn’t be immediately. The second one wants to say goodbye to his family which seems reasonable, but we are talking about Jesus here and he knows our hearts and maybe he knows these two men are hesitating even though they know they should follow him. They both give him “yes, but…” excuses. Have you ever made an excuse not to go somewhere you didn’t really want to go? Have you ever come up with a reason for not visiting someone you knew you probably should? Can’t miss this meeting (where I will probably just sit there on Zoom and go through emails). Have a doctor’s appointment (that I could probably reschedule pretty easily). Already have something planned (that I just made up in my head this very second). We have excuses galore for not doing what we know we should be doing, but you can’t fool Jesus.
H.G. Wells once wrote, “Adapt or perish, now as ever, is Nature’s inexorable imperative.”
Change, transformation, is a natural part of our lives and we either accept it or we deny it but if we deny it, we are denying ourselves opportunities for a better life. Holding on to the things from the past can stunt our growth, can inhibit who we are meant to become, and can stop us from being everything God meant for us to be. Even people who have accepted Christ in their life often deny themselves the opportunity to grow, getting stuck in their ways, feeling like the world needs to return to better times, but better for who? It wasn’t all that long ago we didn’t have child labor laws and children would routinely be abused and exploited. It was within the last century that women were not considered the equals of men and were not allowed a voice or a vote. It was less than that when people with different skin colors were considered “separate but equal” which was just another term for excusable racism. Is that the “better” life we want to return to? We live in a better world today where our kids and our grandkids have more opportunities than we did before because we chose a better life – a life that if you simply read the Bible you know is the life God wants us to have. We still have a long way to go.
As much as I would like to go on the teacups again, I know I shouldn’t.
It wouldn’t be good for me. But that doesn’t mean I’m missing out either. Instead, I’ve learned to appreciate the other things around me that I didn’t always pay attention to when I was younger. Like the slower rides I used to pass by in my youth or the tours I never had the time to do before which turns out are pretty fascinating. We can fondly remember the past without it holding us back. Maybe we should do that more in our lives. Instead of pining for the past, we should focus instead on what new things we can discover! Instead of bemoaning how we need to return to the way things were, we look for what new wonders are in front of us. And instead of denying the work God wants to do in you, take a chance and embrace where the Holy Spirit is leading you. If you’re here today, it means God has called you in some way, because you easily could have made an excuse for not being here. Millions of people around the world did. But you made the choice to be here which is amazing! Open yourself up to the Holy Spirit. Lead a life of wonder and imagination! Enjoy life in the now. Find the richness of life today. We can’t restore the past, but we can find a way to transform the future.
Open 24/7
Do you know about PJS?
And I’m not talking about the nighttime clothes you wear to bed. PJS is a simple acronym to describe how John Wesley understood the grace of God. The letters, P, J, and S, stand for prevenient, justifying, and sanctifying grace. It may sound like Wesley believed in three different types of grace, but it might be better to think of them as STAGES of grace instead of different types. We move through the grace of God draw closer to him in that order – P, J, S – prevenient, justifying, and sanctifying grace.
But what is “grace?”
If you have a Bible or a Bible app please find Paul’s letter to the Ephesians, chapter 2, beginning with verse 1. Ephesians 2:1. We talk about grace all the time and in so many ways I think we sometimes lose sight of what it means. Put simply, grace is the unmerited, undeserved gift of God that moves us toward Him. God continually acts in the world to draw us closer not because of anything we said or did but just because he loves us and wants to be part of our lives. Paul talked about it in his letter to the church in Ephesus that we’ll read together this morning.
As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, 2 in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. 3 All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our flesh and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature deserving of wrath. 4 But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, 5 made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved. 6 And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, 7 in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. 8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9 not by works, so that no one can boast. 10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
Paul wants us to know we all need the grace of God.
Without it as Paul noted, we’re dead, meaning there is no future for us beyond this earth. Only because of God’s grace, because of his gift to humanity, we have a chance for a better, eternal life. By nature, we are disobedient people who follow our own wants and desires instead of listening to God. As Paul put it, we are often more concerned with “gratifying the cravings of the flesh” than drawing closer to God. Have you ever skipped church because you wanted to sleep in? Have there been times you told yourself you “deserve” a break from church as if church is a chore? Or you skipped taking time to give thanks to God? Or you didn’t feel like saying a prayer even when you needed it? We all make excuses for not doing what we know is good for us because there is something else we WANT to do more. We’d stay that way, too if it wasn’t for the fact that God keeps reaching out to us over and over and over again. At each point in our lives, God is there. And for us who consider ourselves followers of Christ, it was because of God’s efforts we finally understand how much we need him.
God is working in our lives 24/7, constantly reaching out to us.
Like Disneyland, God never closes. Did you know that when Disneyland closes its doors to the public there are always people working in the background? They have electricians who walk the park replacing lightbulbs, painters who touch up areas that get worn down, custodians who power wash all the streets so they are fresh and clean when the doors open the next day. God is like that. Even when you can’t see him, he’s working in the background, putting in the time so when you’re ready you can see all that he has done to prepare for you. That’s what Wesley called prevenient grace. Prevenient grace is the grace that comes before we know we need God. For me, the clearest example of prevenient grace came from my mom. It was when I was about eight years old and my grandmother passed away. She was the one who gave me those sugar cookies with the cherry on top. When she passed away, I had no idea what death was about. Nobody that close to me had ever died before, and so when she did, I asked my mom what happened and I’ve never forgotten her response. She said, “I believe she is in Heaven with God.” This might not seem all that remarkable to you if you grew up knowing about God and Heaven and living in a Christian home, but we were none of those things. We were nominally Buddhist at best. So, what in the world would have prompted my mom to say that to me, to frame death as something heavenly? I even asked her about it once and she said she didn’t know, but as I came to understand God better, I realized it was God’s prevenient grace. It was the moment I needed to jumpstart my thinking toward God. From that point on, I can point to different friends, family, and other people right up to Cassie who kept prompting me into a closer relationship with God. God didn’t come and give them some sort of playbook. He didn’t coordinate some massive campaign to turn me into a believer. It was his constant work in my life that finally got my eyes to see and ears to hear. And it was at that moment God’s justifying grace kicked in.
To Wesley, justifying grace is the grace of forgiveness God gives when we realize we are lost.
It’s that brief moment when our hearts and minds finally turn to God. Justify means “to make right,” and in our faith it means to bring us back into alignment with God. For some it comes much earlier than others. If you have a hard head like me, it takes a few decades. But when you finally come around, God covers up your sins and forgets about them. It’s a misconception to say God erases the sins of our past. What’s done is done, and God doesn’t have memory impairment. Instead, God CHOOSES not to see them. It’s like he puts a blanket over them and just pretends they aren’t there. It’s sort of like when your mom or dad told you to clean up your room before going to get ice cream or something. You wanted that ice cream BAD, so you shoved everything in your closet or under your bed so you could go. Your room LOOKED clean, but you weren’t fooling anyone, least of all your parents who probably did the same thing at one time. But they chose to ignore the mess and take you out anyway, and that’s what God does. That’s why it’s called grace. God CHOOSES not to see the mess we’ve made and instead accepts us back. And once we’ve turned to God, his sanctifying grace moves us forward.
Sanctifying grace is the ongoing grace of God that moves us toward Christian perfection.
Wesley thought it was possible for human beings to achieve spiritual perfection in THIS lifetime. Most of us will never achieve it, but he did think it was possible. Not that we would forever BE perfect, but that if we kept moving in that direction, we could, for a moment or for small moments at a time, we could experience it if even for the briefest amount of time. He defined perfection as having 100% focus on God. That wasn’t a punishment. It was being in the peace of Christ and knowing you were aligned with God’s will. Wesley himself only thought he achieved this milestone at the end of his life. This was a man who would get up at four in the morning and pray for three hours straight before devoting the rest of his day to God. Needless to say, this idea of Christian perfection is not easy. God’s sanctifying grace is what makes this even possible. God’s presence, God’s inspiration, God’s forgiveness, God’s mercy – all of these are what makes the goal of spiritual perfection possible. But Wesley also felt we could backslide, meaning we could fall from grace. Not that God would remove us but that we would choose to remove ourselves. Either by our pride or stubbornness or greed or other human trait, we could go back to being the way we were before we accepted God in our lives. So let us stay vigilant and that means attending to the means of grace – worship, prayer, study, thinking of others, doing what is right instead of what is easy.
For now, I hope you will practice grace in your own lives.
Like God has shown grace to us, we should show grace to others, or we might end up being like the Sheriff of the Internet.[1] Ben Edelman is an associate professor at Harvard Business School. He’s also a lawyer, an $800/hour consultant, and known as the “Sheriff of the Internet for pursuing companies he believes have committed online fraud.”[2] He ordered $53.35 worth of food from Sichuan Gardens, a small locally owned Chinese restaurant, including Shredded Chicken with Spicy Garlic Sauce and Braised Fish Filets and Napa Cabbage with Roasted Chilis.[3] Sounds yummy right? Turns out he was overcharged by $4 so the Sheriff of the Internet took it upon himself to right this most grievous of wrongs and threatened legal action against the restaurant as well as demanding $12 be refunded to him according to “Massachusetts Protection Statute, MGL93a.”[4] This professor of the Harvard Business School decided it was worth the time, effort, expense, and energy to hassle a restaurant over $4 which they offered to refund right away. He notified the authorities, he sent long email after long exhausting email, and made a monumental mountain out of a molehill. The story broke on social media and soon people were coming from all over to eat at Sichuan Gardens to support the owner and blast the Sheriff. A campaign even got started to donate $4 to the Boston Food Bank. Eventually the Sheriff of the Internet relented and issued his own apology. But all of this could have been avoided had Ben at any point in time decided that grace was better than justice. It was obvious this was not malfeasance but instead a small and simple mistake by a local guy just trying to earn a living. Had he offered forgiveness, mercy, or empathy to the owner of Sichuan Gardens, all would have been solved. Besides, he even admitted the food was delicious.
Don’t be the sheriff.
Be filled with grace as God made you and show that grace to those around you. To your spouse. To your kids. To your friends. Even to the stranger who just can’t seem to operate the self-checkout line. Show grace in the form of love, mercy, kindness, and forgiveness just as God has done for you. Perhaps you will be an inspiration to someone else. Perhaps your actions will lead others to act with more grace as well. And perhaps, just perhaps, we’ll make this world a better place to live. Just remember, God’s grace has, is, and always will be available to you 24/7.
[1] http://www.npr.org/2014/12/13/370347429/outrage-over-chinese-takeout-brings-to-mind-a-maxim
[2] Ibid.
[3] http://www.boston.com/food-dining/restaurants/2014/12/09/harvard-business-school-professor-goes-war-over-worth-chinese-food/KfMaEhab6uUY1COCnTbrXP/story.html
[4] Op Cit, npr.org
The McDonald’s Connection
12 Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. 13 For we were all baptized by[c] one Spirit so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink. 14 Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many.
15 Now if the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. 16 And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. 17 If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? 18 But in fact God has placed the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. 19 If they were all one part, where would the body be? 20 As it is, there are many parts, but one body. – 1 Corinthians 12:12-20
We are the McDonald’s of churches.
Growing up, I never even considered that McDonald’s might sell different things in different places. That is until I saw the movie Pulp Fiction. Even if you haven’t seen it, you might know the scene. Vincent and Jules are driving in a car together and Vincent tells Jules it’s the little things in Europe that are funny and as an example he asks Jules, “You know what they call a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in Paris?” And Jules responds, “They don’t call it a Quarter Pounder with Cheese?” Vincet replies, “No man, they got the metric system…They call it a Royale with Cheese.” Never even considered that before. About a dozen years later, I’m in Hawaii for the first time and we passed by a McDonald’s on the way to our hotel and I was shocked to see they served Portuguese Sausage and Eggs as a breakfast item! What?! Wow. Not only did they call things by different names, but they had also completely different menu items in different places. That was what began my fascination with McDonald’s. To me it was so cool that I could go to any McDonald’s around the world and eat from the comforts of home, but ALSO that I could go different places and try different things at the same place. I’ve been blessed to travel to different countries around the world (thanks mostly to Cassie and frequent flyer miles) and in each place we go I try to stop by a local McDonald’s just to see what they have, even if I don’t try the food. In Canada, no surprise, they sell poutine which is fries covered in gravy with cheese curds. We happened to be in Quebec, home of the poutine, where they sell the exclusive Spicy Buffalo Crispy version.[1] In France they sell macarons in the McCafé made by the same company that makes them for the very famous macaron store, Laduree.[2] And in Japan they have both the Filet-O-Fish AND the Ebi Filet-O which is a shrimp version served with lettuce instead of cheese.[3] It’s pretty fascinating the breadth and depth of things they sell to customize to the local population. In the Philippines, in order to compete with Jollibee, they introduced the McSpaghetti with a more sweet-flavored sauce than the standard American version.[4] Jollibee is so big it’s one of the few chains that McDonald’s has to play catch up with.
The United Methodist Church that we are a part of operates in a similar way.
We are uniquely local and globally distinct. Now more than ever. At the last General Conference which is an international gathering of every local conference in the world, they passed a resolution to allow for even more distinct flavors of Methodism while still adhering to a common belief system. In that way, we are a lot like McDonald’s. Every United Methodist Church abides by a common set of rules, a common book of worship, and a common hymnal, but variations from place to place and even within a country are totally normal. Take communion for example. When Cassie and I were looking for a church to call home, we found one church that used King’s Hawaiian bread for communion. That one got my vote right away. One time when I was serving at a church, we didn’t have a loaf of bread available, so when I lifted the cloth covering the elements, I found two pieces of Wonder Bread waiting for me. There was something lovable and humbling about that moment. Some churches serve communion by intinction, meaning you dip the bread into the cup, and others have individual servings like we do. Yet we all have the same basic structure to communion that remains the same in every church globally. Uniquely local and globally distinct.
We have what is called a connectional system.
Our church is part of a district, which is part of a conference, which is part of a jurisdiction, which is part of a region, which is part of the global church. We make decisions about how we will operate as a church together. We decide together the things we believe and stand up for. And at the same time the local church like ours has incredible autonomy. We decide how to use our funds. We decide how we do worship. We decide what activities and groups we create and support. Believe it or not, my favorite part about being a connectional church is apportionments. If you know what apportionments are you are probably surprised because most people think of them as a tax on the local church. If you don’t know, apportionments are the amount of money we give to the conference to support not only our Bishop and the Cabinet and the work they do for the conference, but to support the global church as well. Ten cents of every dollar donated goes to the wider church with most of that staying in our conference. Only two cents of every dollar goes to the global church, but it’s amazing what those “two cents” can do. Imagine No Malaria was a campaign of the United Methodist Church to help drive out the devastating and completely preventable deaths caused by the disease in sub-Saharan Africa. Launched in 2010, in the seven years the program was in place it has been estimated that it saved 6.8 MILLION lives and life expectancy increased by 9.4 years – 1.2 of which are directly attributed to stopping malaria from killing people.[5] Sadly, there is still a long way to go. Could our church have done the same on its own? Sure, we could have sent nets to Africa, but the combined efforts of our global church not only provided funding for the initiatives that saved lives, but also the people and the organization to distribute aid productively. So when someone says if you’d like to add your two cents, say “yes please, I just might be saving lives.” We can do more together than any one church can do by itself.
That’s why this passage from 1 Corinthians is meaningful.
Each one of our churches, each one of YOU is important to the body of Christ. And even though we have differences we are united by a common cause – to help people around the world and in our homes know the love of Jesus Christ. By ourselves that would be tough, but working together, we can do so much more, have such a bigger effect, and make a bigger difference in the world. We continue to work with other churches outside of the United Methodist Church to strengthen ties and to work toward becoming the body of Christ that Jesus envisioned. But because we are human, it is a long and slow process but one that gives us hope for a better future.
What makes McDonald’s so successful isn’t their gourmet burgers.
It’s the consistency of their product found wherever you go. The same taste and flavor you remember growing up you can find in just about any part of the world. And that is comforting. But McDonald’s also strives to honor the places they inhabit. They like to reflect the local desires and tastes of the people they serve and sometimes those local inventions go on to change the entire company. The McFlurry was invented in Canada, the Happy Meal was invented in Guatemala City, and the Filet-O-Fish was developed by an owner in Cincinnati, Ohio who wanted to serve his Catholic customers something good to eat on Friday during Lent. The same is true for our church. We can go into any Methodist church in the country and even the world and it will feel familiar, but each place will add their own twist to it. When I was a seminary student, I had the incredible opportunity to join the World Methodist Evangelical Institute in a little seaside town called Sete. We were given the chance to worship with different local churches around the city and I even was invited to read a piece of Scripture (in English) to the congregation. Afterward, we celebrated communion together using actual wine that the pastor’s wife had made in her own backyard vineyard! Because of French culture, it’s one of the only places they use actual wine instead of grape juice and to have it made by the pastor’s wife was a blessing. Each church is part of the greater body and while we can be unified in our beliefs, each one of us adds something different to the mix, but all of us are important to what we hope to accomplish – to share the love of Christ with the world.
[1] Gary He, McAtlas, (Princeton, NJ: Parla Publishing, 2024), 68. For more on all of these wacky and fun dishes you can check out his book!
[2] Ibid. 156 – I’m even finding out more in depth stuff!
[3] Ibid. 275.
[4] Ibid, 333.
[5] From the summary of the Imagine No Malaria campaign. If the link doesn’t work, just look up Imagine No Malaria in your browser.
Craig's Corner 