The Last Invention?

If it were up to AI, there would be no Shohei Ohtani.

When Ohtani was about to enter his pro career in baseball, he asked every Japanese team NOT to pick him in the upcoming Nippon Professional Baseball league draft. He was going pro and instead of going the traditional route, he planned to try his luck by going directly to Major League Baseball in the states.ย  But one team drafted him anyway โ€“ the Nippon Ham Fighters.ย  The Ham Fighters were led by an unusual manager, Hideki Kuriyama, who ignored Ohtaniโ€™s advice and drafted him anyway.ย  By all accounts, it should have been a wasted pick, but he asked Shohei to give him one opportunity to talk to him.ย  Shohei, being the respectful young man that he was, agreed.ย  In that talk, the manager told him that he saw potential in Shohei to be the first truly two-way player.ย  Every other team would ave forced him to pick one or the other because itโ€™s just not done any other way, and for sure he would have been drafted as a pitcher because his skills as a pitcher were more in demand.ย  At the time, Shohei was an above average hitter, but he was already an exceptional pitcher so there was little doubt which way he would go. But the manager said if Shohei gave the team a chance he promised to develop him as a two-way player and anytime Shohei felt it was time to go he would let him try his luck in Major League Baseball.ย  Shohei agreed.ย  The press gave him a hard time for trying to have it both ways. Other teams were critical of him as were other players and even some of the fans. They said he was being disrespectful to the game because nobody did both.ย  It wasnโ€™t the way it was supposed to be.ย  But the manager told Shohei to forget the critics and just play baseball and he did.ย  Well, the Ham Fighters were right. Shohei did have the talent to be a two-way player. In fact, most students of the game will say he is likely the best player to have ever played the game. Only Babe Ruth did both well and even he didnโ€™t do it at the level of Shohei Ohtani.ย  They call him โ€œThe Unicornโ€ because thatโ€™s how rare his talent is.ย  He has won FOUR MVP awards including two in both the American League and the National League. He has already won two World Series rings in his first two seasons with the Dodgers. And he became the first player in history to hit 50 home runs AND steal 50 bases. This past postseason, I just watched what was likely the greatest game any single player has ever played.ย  He not only pitched for the Dodgers in the NLCS and won the game after striking out ten batters, but in the process hit three home runs including the longest post-season home run ever at Dodgers Stadium. This is the kind of talent you can never predict.ย  This is the reason AI would never produce a Shohei Ohtani.

It’s not whether or not Shohei is the greatest player, but which performance will define him the most.

I donโ€™t have anything against AI personally.

Like most things, AI is neither good nor bad by itself. It is technology. It can be both incredibly useful and cause great harm. The potential is still limitless and both those who predict a utopian world because of AI or the end of life as we know it have plausible and reasonable arguments. We simply donโ€™t know. But one thing we do know is AI cannot create something truly original. It can mimic originality to the point you might honestly believe it. But it just canโ€™t make the leap to true originality. Thatโ€™s because AI draws on vast amounts of knowledge we have already accumulated and bases its response on that knowledge. But it canโ€™t create something out of nothing. It can perfect it. It can make it better. But if all the data points in a certain direction, that is the way it will go. Hence, why Shohei would never be the greatest player on the planet.  Because no one has ever done it that way before. Truly out of the box thinking is not possible for AI. It might consider it but never give it real credence because the odds are so astronomical. But sometimes it is that out of the box thinking that manifests fantasy into reality and makes the world a better place. My favorite example of this (other than Ohtani) is of course related to Disney. When Walt sought to bring animation to the big screen as a full-length feature film, โ€œeveryoneโ€ thought he was crazy. In fact, they called it โ€œDisneyโ€™s Follyโ€ and thought it would be the ruin of him. Instead, it launched an all-new way of storytelling that revolutionized the movie industry and the lives of people for generations to come. After opening day at Disneyland, again the critics declared it would be a colossal failure and even dubbed it โ€œWaltโ€™s Nightmare.โ€[1] Nine-hundred million visitors later those critics were proven wrong.[2]

Artificial intelligence is a reality.

How we use it and what we do with it will be our true test. Will we take the easy way out?ย  Or will we use AI not as means of shirking our duties or cheating the system but instead to enhance what we are doing for the good of all? You might think this is a weird passage to use to reference AI but hear me out. Right before this, the people tell Samuel, โ€œWe want a king!โ€ To be fair, Samuelโ€™s sons were pretty despicable. The Bible even tells us they were dishonest, accepted bribes, and perverted justice. I wouldnโ€™t trust them either. But they were forgetting that they already had a king โ€“ God. Samuel was upset about all of this so he prayed to God about it and God told him not to feel bad because it wasnโ€™t Samuel they were rejecting. It was God himself.ย  God told Samuel to go to the people and tell them the consequences of having a human king.ย  And this is what Samuel shared.ย 

10 Samuel told all the words of the Lord to the people who were asking him for a king. 11 He said, โ€œThis is what the king who will reign over you will claim as his rights: He will take your sons and make them serve with his chariots and horses, and they will run in front of his chariots. 12 Some he will assign to be commanders of thousands and commanders of fifties, and others to plow his ground and reap his harvest, and still others to make weapons of war and equipment for his chariots. 13 He will take your daughters to be perfumers and cooks and bakers. 14 He will take the best of your fields and vineyards and olive groves and give them to his attendants. 15 He will take a tenth of your grain and of your vintage and give it to his officials and attendants. 16 Your male and female servants and the best of your cattle[c] and donkeys he will take for his own use. 17 He will take a tenth of your flocks, and you yourselves will become his slaves. 18 When that day comes, you will cry out for relief from the king you have chosen, but the Lord will not answer you in that day.โ€

19 But the people refused to listen to Samuel. โ€œNo!โ€ they said. โ€œWe want a king over us. 20 Then we will be like all the other nations, with a king to lead us and to go out before us and fight our battles.โ€

21 When Samuel heard all that the people said, he repeated it before the Lord. 22 The Lord answered, โ€œListen to them and give them a king.โ€

Then Samuel said to the Israelites, โ€œEveryone go back to your own town.โ€ 1 Samuel 8:10-22

The truth comes out.

โ€œWe want to be cool like everyone else. We want a king to tell us what to do and to do everything for us, so we donโ€™t have to accept responsibility for our actions.โ€ Now of course thatโ€™s not what they actually said, but in essence, it is. They want someone to just tell them what to do so they donโ€™t have to do the hard work and figure it out for themselves.  They want someone to do the work for them like fight their battles so they donโ€™t have to accept responsibility for it, and they can go about their lives without having to consider the consequences. Samuel even tells them, โ€œLook, this king you want? Heโ€™s going to take your best cattle. Heโ€™s going to take at least a tenth of your money. Heโ€™s going to take your land and give them as gifts to his sycophants. Then heโ€™s going to take your sons and daughters to do with as he will. And finally, heโ€™s going to take your freedom.โ€ And they said, โ€œWe donโ€™t care!โ€ Human beings are always looking for the easy way out, even when the easy way turns out to be horrible!  We love avoiding the hard work, but itโ€™s in the hard work that the best work gets done. 

AI is great at many things, but its the bonds we form through both ups and downs that define a true relationship. When a person learns to actually know you instead of catering to you is when you can tell you’re in a real relationship.

Already teachers are having a hard time.

Kids are using AI to get out of doing their homework. Sure, it might mean they get a good grade. It might mean they have a better chance of getting into that top university. But when push comes to shove, they wonโ€™t have the knowledge, the skill, or the ability to truly succeed because they cheated their way through life. ย Life isnโ€™t like a hotel commercial: โ€œYouโ€™re not Dr. Stewart!โ€ โ€œNo, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.โ€ Kids who use AI to cheat are only truly cheating themselves because itโ€™s not the grade that matters, itโ€™s the learning behind it. But thatโ€™s only one way we are opting out of doing the hard work. Weโ€™re choosing to turn to AI to satisfy our needs for intimacy. That is a dangerous road because no machine can truly give you the human connection of another person or build a life with you. It can say all the things you want it to say; it can offer comfort on demand exactly as you want it, and even pretend sexual intimacy, but nothing will ever match the true beauty of a relationship that has been built together. Nothing can replace your hand being held when youโ€™re lying in a hospital bed. Or the willingness of a partner who does something for you not because itโ€™s been programmed to, but because they truly love you. It takes hard work to build that kind of relationship, but in the end its worth more than anything else.

I donโ€™t know about you, but Iโ€™m worried for the future.

AI isnโ€™t to blame. We are. Our attitude as the human race needs to improve. Instead of looking for the easy way out, we need to put in the hard work and let Godโ€™s gifts shine. God put it within each of us to contribute to the great tapestry that makes up our lives, but how will we ever discover what we can do if weโ€™re always looking for the cheat code to life? Take the challenge. Do the hard work. Discover for yourself what God wants you to do at this time in your life. Whether you are old or young, big or small, you have gifts to offer, and your gifts could make the world a better place.ย 

Funny note, as Iโ€™m writing this and correcting mistakes, I keep getting the prompt, โ€œRewrite this paragraph with Copilotโ€ (Microsoftโ€™s AI). Donโ€™t worry. I didnโ€™t use it.ย  Not even once.


[1] Brady MacDonald, โ€œDisneyland got off to a nightmare start in 1955, but โ€˜Waltโ€™s Follyโ€™ quickly won over fans,โ€ Los Angeles Times, July 10, 2015, https://www.latimes.com/travel/la-tr-d-disneyland-opening-day-20150712-story.html

[2] Austin Haughton, โ€œDisneyland Attendance Crosses 900 Million Guests,โ€ WDWNT.com, January 12, 2026, https://wdwnt.com/2026/01/disneyland-attendance-crosses-900-million-guests/ – originally cites an article from the Orange County Register. Corroborated by an article in the Los Angeles Times but that article is behind a paywall.

Loving Day

When I first met Jon, he didnโ€™t like the church.

And I get it. He had every right considering what happened to his friends. We used to play this game called Legends of the Five Rings based on ancient Japanese mythology, and a bunch of us would gather at different game stores to play. We had a blast and I could honestly call all of them friends. Jon was the one who got me into it. I wandered into this game store one day back when we lived in Georgia and saw a bunch of guys playing this game that looked pretty cool and Jon offered to teach me to play. I was hooked ever since. We became friends. He knew I was a pastor and I knew he didnโ€™t go to church, so we left it at that. We had a bond through this game and eventually, my curiosity bubbled up, so I asked him what the story was especially in church-laden Georgia where the churches outnumber CVS. And he told me. He had these two friends who wanted to get married. They were in love and decided it was time to take the next step. She wanted a church wedding, so her and her fiancรฉ went to her pastor to see about getting married. Iโ€™m sure they were largely expecting to nail down possible dates and times, see when the church was available, maybe talk about types of wedding ceremonies. Instead, he told them he wouldnโ€™t do it. That their marriage would be, and I quote, โ€œan abomination in the eyes of God.โ€ Jon told me, โ€œI canโ€™t believe in a God like that.โ€ I told him neither could I.

His two friends were of different races.

One was black and one was white. And there are still pastors and churches today who look at interracial marriage as โ€œan abomination.โ€ My guess is they havenโ€™t actually read the Bible because any cursory reading of it would lead you to the conclusion God would never say that. But itโ€™s still enough of a commonly held belief that I knew in a moment his story was true, especially in the Bible Belt where you can call racism Biblical.  Race still matters and black and white more than most for some unknown reason. I still donโ€™t understand it, but I think thatโ€™s because I grew up in California. Not that racism doesnโ€™t exist here because it definitely does and Iโ€™ve experienced it myself. But it is different where the divide and the deep history with slavery between Black and White isnโ€™t as stark. Hereโ€™s how wild this racism is. When I was working at the credit union, one of our friends was from the South and she told us how she liked California because she could date whoever she wanted, so we asked her about that and she said, โ€œOh, in Georgia I could never take a Black guy home to meet my parents.โ€ And my friend Albert asked, โ€œWell what if you were dating Craig? How would you parents react?โ€ You know what she said? โ€œOh, they would be fine with that.โ€ We didnโ€™t understand so she explained, โ€œIn the South, thereโ€™s Black and thereโ€™s not Black and heโ€™s not Black.โ€ Obviously, that is not how everyone feels who lives in the South, but to say racism doesnโ€™t exist is to live like an ostrich with our heads in the ground.

Where do these ideas of racial purity come from?

Believe it or not, some Christians believe they come from the Bible. But theyโ€™re wrong and weโ€™re going to explore how damaging it is when Christians put their own biases, fears, and prejudice ahead of Godโ€™s word. People love to use the Bible to justify their own thoughts and actions because if the Bible says it then it must be okay. But take anything out of context and you arenโ€™t getting the message the way it was supposed to be received. When you only see part of an image or listen to half of a conversation, you might be able to guess from context clues what was seen or said, but youโ€™re also just as likely to misunderstand it completely. It makes me think of 1 Corinthians 13:12, โ€œFor now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.โ€ In this passage, Paul is emphasizing how little we truly know about God and how it is so easy to doubt God or misunderstand our path in life because we canโ€™t possibly know all the things God knows. We donโ€™t know the complexities of the world we live in and how one action creates ripple effects across time and space that affect who we are. So we jump to conclusions, often to support our own narrative instead of putting our trust in the Lord. Just as in this passage we are about to share which has been used to justify the condemnation of interracial marriage. 

When the Lord your God brings you into the land you are entering to possess and drives out before you many nationsโ€”the Hittites, Girgashites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites, seven nations larger and stronger than youโ€” and when the Lord your God has delivered them over to you and you have defeated them, then you must destroy them totally. Make no treaty with them, and show them no mercy. Do not intermarry with them. Do not give your daughters to their sons or take their daughters for your sons, for they will turn your children away from following me to serve other gods, and the Lordโ€™s anger will burn against you and will quickly destroy you. This is what you are to do to them: Break down their altars, smash their sacred stones, cut down their Asherah poles and burn their idols in the fire. For you are a people holy to the Lord your God. The Lord your God has chosen you out of all the peoples on the face of the earth to be his people, his treasured possession. โ€“ Deuteronomy 7:1-6

Do not intermarry.

Three tiny words in this whole passage and suddenly interracial marriage is condemned. By the way, this was not a condemnation of interracial marriage at all. It was a warning to the tribes of Israel about marrying people of a different faith because of the problems and conflicts that arise when any two people who have strong differing beliefs enter into a life together. Paul writes, โ€œโ€ฆfor they will turn your children away from following me to serve other godsโ€ฆโ€ And that can be true. Sometimes people who do not have a strong faith will turn away and serve other gods, and sometimes it works the other way as well.  But even in those instances the church does not forbid it. Even the Catholic Church, the stalwart of enforcing the rules, does not forbid it even if they discourage it. Again, because of the issues it brings. But people can work it out. People can make it work. It offers challenges and hardships when you have two different belief systems, but that doesnโ€™t mean love wonโ€™t win out.

From L to R: My brother-in-law Rob, my sister Karen, Sandy and me.

Interracial marriages can have challenges too.

Funny quick story. When Cassie and I were about to visit my parents for the first time, it was after we had gotten engaged and Cassie asked me in all earnestness if my parents would be okay with us getting married. II assured her it would be fine. After all, my sister Karen crossed that barrier first. Cassie looked at me. paused and said, โ€œIsnโ€™t he Korean?โ€  And I just nodded my head like it was obvious. To which Cassie responded, โ€œThatโ€™s not the same thing!โ€  Of course, my parents were more than okay with Cassie.  In a lot of ways sheโ€™s more Japanese than I am!  She eats ALL the New Yearโ€™s dishes.  But Cassie had a legitimate concern because racial prejudice can be a huge hurdle and sometimes you do have to choose between the family that raised you and the one youโ€™re just starting.  And that can be devastating.  But it shouldnโ€™t be.

Brett and I at a church conference at Epcot

As Christians, our job is to love not to judge.

Leave the judging up to God. Our role as parents, as friends, and as family is to be supportive even when we disagree.  Itโ€™s fine to express your concerns. Itโ€™s a good thing to bring up potential sticking points where there might be conflict. Itโ€™s okay to express doubt in a calm and loving way. But once you get into the territory of threats or condemnation or rejection? You are not only putting your relationship in danger, but youโ€™re doing the opposite of what God calls on us to do โ€“ love one another. Let me put it to you this way. When I first started out in ministry, I was working for a friend of mine named Brett. And the first time I was asked to do a wedding, I asked for his help. He shared with me his resources and his coupleโ€™s questionnaire (which I still use to this day) and I asked him, โ€œWhat do you do if a couple asks you to marry them and you KNOW they arenโ€™t a good fit?โ€ And he said, โ€œIโ€™ll marry them anyway.โ€  I was at first surprised, but his reasoning was about as sound as you could ask for.  He said, โ€œIf they really believe they are in love, they are going to get married with or without you. By telling them you wonโ€™t marry them just alienates them from the church. Iโ€™d rather have them feel we are here as a resource when things go bad than to feel alone with no one to turn to.โ€  Whether you are a minister or maid of honor, we should all approach marriage with the same thought of preserving the relationship. Because isnโ€™t that what matters most?

June 12th is Loving Day.

And Iโ€™m sure most people have no idea what that is. Sounds like another โ€œHallmark holidayโ€ like Sweetest Day. But in fact, itโ€™s the day when laws against interracial marriage were struck down nationwide. In the case of Loving v. Virginia (1967), (hence the name) the Supreme Court ruled in favor of Mildred Delores Jeter and Richard Perry Loving and overturned their conviction. They were free to live with one another and love one another as they always wanted.[1] But that didnโ€™t mean instantly racism was gone. People still have to find it in their heart to let go of old prejudices. At the time of the decision, less than 20% of Americans approved of marriage between a Black person and a White person, and as late as the year 2000, that number was only about 65%!ย  Today, that number is up to 94%.[2] Yet hate still abounds. We just keep finding different ways to show it. In 2024 there were over 11,000 incidents of hate crimes in the United States and still over 50% of them were race related, with religion and sexual orientation make up a large chunk of the rest.[3] That is not the world God wants us to live in. Let us always be on our guard against fear and prejudice. Not just out there but in our own hearts as well. Itโ€™s so easy to think the work is done, but we still have a way to go.ย  Let us be a witness to love in the world today.


[1] โ€œThe Loving Day Story,โ€ LovingDay.org, https://lovingday.org/the-loving-story/

[2] Justin McCarthy, โ€œU.S. Approval of Interracial Marriage at New High of 94%,โ€ Gallup, September 10, 2021, https://news.gallup.com/poll/354638/approval-interracial-marriage-new-high.aspx

[3] โ€œFBI Releases 2024 Hate Crime Statistics,โ€ U.S. Deparment of Justice, September 24, 2025, https://www.justice.gov/hatecrimes/hate-crime-statistics

How Facebook Killed the Church

Who would have thought Facebook would end the church?

Have you ever wondered why it seems so hard to get people to come on a Sunday morning? Especially if you grew up coming to church, it just seems like what you are supposed to do. Why is it so hard to get people in the doors? And more importantly, to STAY in the doors? Richard Beck thought he had the answer. And the culprit was Facebook. Way back in 2010, he wrote a blog post called, โ€œHow Facebook Killed the Church,โ€[1] and to be fair it wasnโ€™t Facebook itself that was killing the church โ€“ we were. In 1956, 96% of Americans identified as Christian; today that number is down to 68%.[2] And itโ€™s not like they are flocking to other religions. Instead, they are increasingly becoming disengaged from the church.[3] Itโ€™s no big secret church attendance is down. Across the country, church attendance has dropped over the last couple of decades in nearly every major religion โ€“ not just Christianity. At the turn of the century about 42% of adults in the US were attending worship weekly or almost every week, but as of a few years ago that number had dipped to just 30%.[4]  Attendance at Sunday worship has dropped whether you live in the Bible Belt, the Sun Belt, the Rust Belt, or even the Jell-O Belt.  Yes, itโ€™s a real thing.  The Jell-O Belt, also called โ€œthe Mormon Corridor,โ€ was given its name because Mormons like Jell-O. In fact, Jell-O is the official snack food of the state of Utah.[5]  But I digress. All that to say most people are just not interested in coming to church.

The reasons are not all that surprising.

They question the teachings of the church, they donโ€™t like organized religion, or they donโ€™t feel like they need religion.[6] They find God elsewhere, they feel church is irrelevant, or just plain boring.[7] But here is the interesting thing. While all those things are true, they are also not new.[8]  Beckโ€™s argument is there is a reason people have chosen this time to abandon the church instead of say the โ€˜80s or โ€˜90s, and thatโ€™s because weโ€™ve been replaced by something else โ€“ Facebook. Or social media in general. And itโ€™s not just social media but technology in general has taken away the spot church used to fill.

โ€œHow Facebook Killed the Churchโ€ is about the loss of that โ€œthird placeโ€ in American culture.

Home and work are the first two places in our lives.  They are the places we spend most of our time, but this โ€œthird placeโ€โ€ฆ this โ€œthird placeโ€ is where we connect to the broader community.[9]  Third places are important. Itโ€™s where we gather, where we form bonds, where we meet our future spouses. And Church used to be one of these โ€œthird places.โ€  In its heyday back in the 1950โ€™s, church was THE place to be. Even if the services bored you, even if you werenโ€™t learning anything, even if the preacher was no good, you came anyway because it was the social hub of the community. Thatโ€™s not true anymore.  Technology has made us HYPER-CONNECTED.  Through Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp and so many others, there is a plethora of ways to stay connected, find a spouse, or talk about any subject on the planet and that โ€œthird placeโ€ is being transformed into something different.  As Beck wrote, โ€œMillennials are in a different social situation. They don’t need physical locations for social affiliation. They can make dinner plans via text, cell phone call or Facebook. In short, the thing that kept young people going to church, despite their irritations, has been effectively replaced. You don’t need to go to church to stay connected or in touch. You have an iPhone.โ€[10]

Not surprisingly, people are leaving organized religion. 

Now that we can fill that social connection virtually, it eliminates or at least drastically reduces the need for a specific physical location to be that โ€œthird space.โ€ And with the flight of so many people, maybe itโ€™s time we go back to that fundamental reason the church exists โ€“ to make disciples for Jesus Christ. Instead of trying to be another Starbucks, we should focus on what only we can do โ€“ bring people closer to Jesus, whether that is virtually or in person, through worship or outreach. ย We need to do what only we were created to do.ย  In this passage, Paul is writing to the church at Colossae because they have lost their way.ย  Theyโ€™re beginning to lose their focus on Christ and turning to mysticism and angels and stuff like that instead of keeping Christ at the heart of the church.ย  Sounds a lot like religion today.ย  So, Paul is encouraging them and reminding them of who they are and what the church, the followers of the Way, are supposed to look like.ย 

 12Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

ย 15Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. 16Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. 17And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. – Colossians 3:12-17

Paulโ€™s words are as timely now as it was back then.

Churches lost their focus and instead started turning to things other than God. Again, like many churches today. So, Paul is reminding them who they were created to be โ€“ disciples of Jesus. The kind of people who are compassionate, kind, humble, gentle, and patient.  People who bear with each other instead of complain, forgive each other instead of holding grudges, and overall, love one another in unity. But what makes the church truly special is what Paul writes in the next few verses.  โ€œLet the peace of Christ rule in your heartsโ€ฆโ€  โ€œLet the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one anotherโ€ฆโ€ โ€œAnd whatever you doโ€ฆdo it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.โ€  When we focus on these things, things the church was created to do, we have limitless potential. Dr. Howard Hendricks, a professor at Dallas Theological Seminary, once said, โ€œThere are many things in life you โ€˜can doโ€™ for God. And the more success you have, the more opportunities will come. But most opportunities are distractions in disguise. Therefore, find the one thing you โ€˜must doโ€™ for Godโ€ฆThe secret of concentration is eliminationโ€[11]  

People still need the church.

They may not need the buildings, but they need the church.ย  Everyone struggles with the questions, โ€œWhy am I here?ย  Whatโ€™s the meaning of life?โ€ย  They are questions that haunts us and we spend a great deal of our lives, either consciously or subconsciously, wrestling with them.ย  As Kerry Shook, the author of One Month to Live said, there is a God-shaped hole in our hearts that only God can fill, and until we find him, it will continually gnaw at us.ย  People try to find all sorts of substitutes to fill that hole, like power, money, fame, but until we know the overwhelming love of Jesus Christ, that hole will always be there.ย  There will always be something missing.ย  Facebook and all of social media has become a substitute for those third spaces, but maybe itโ€™s a blessing in disguise. Now we can focus on what only we can do best. Fill those God shaped holes that exist in all of our hearts.


[1] Richard Beck, โ€œHow Facebook Killed the Church,โ€ Experimental Theology, March 5, 2010, https://experimentaltheology.blogspot.com/2010/03/how-facebook-killed-church.html

[2] โ€œHow Religious Are Americans?โ€ Gallup, March 29, 2024, https://news.gallup.com/poll/358364/religious-americans.aspx

[3] Ibid.

[4] Jeffrey M. Jones, โ€œChurch Attendance Has Declined in Most U.S. Religious Groups,โ€ Gallup, March 24, 2024, https://news.gallup.com/poll/642548/church-attendance-declined-religious-groups.aspx – Two groups did show increases over this time: Jewish people and Muslim people, but the increase was minor compared to the droves leaving the Christian churches.

[5] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mormon_Corridor#.22Jell-O_Belt.22

[6] โ€œWhy are โ€˜nonesโ€™ nonreligious?โ€ Pew Research  Center, January 24, 2024, https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2024/01/24/why-are-nones-nonreligious/

[7] โ€œWhat Millennials Want When They Visit Church,โ€ Barna Group, March 4, 2015, https://www.barna.com/research/what-millennials-want-when-they-visit-church/

[8] In his article, Beck argues for a different set of reasons why people are leaving the church, but his point is there is another reason why people are choosing to leave rather than put up with it.

[9] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Third_place  – the concept of the โ€œthird placeโ€ is from sociologist Ray Oldenburg.

[10] Beck, โ€œHow Facebook Killed the Church.โ€

[11] Will Mancini, โ€œEpic Quotes on Discipleship from Prof Howard Hendricks,โ€ VisionRoom,

It Takes a Village

Who would make your list?

One day I plan to win the Academy Award for Best Original Screenplay for my film โ€œA Kidney Between Usโ€ so I need to be ready to give one of those fancy acceptance speeches. Did you know winners only have 45 seconds unless you win one of the big four (Actor, Actress, Director, Film) so my speech will have to be quick and precise.  Of course, you have to thank the Academy since they voted for you in the first place.  And the fans for getting your film recognized.  Cassieโ€ฆEmmaโ€ฆBut who else?  Forty-five seconds is a terribly short time to squeeze in every single person who made a difference in your life, so who would be โ€œOscar worthy?โ€  Because letโ€™s face it.  None of us achieves anything in life on our own.  As much as the idea of the โ€œself-made manโ€ is part of American society, itโ€™s the ultimate in hubris to think we really didnโ€™t have help.  I know people who are fantastic writers who have never had a book published or a script produced; wonderful singers who have never been signed to a record label; artists who havenโ€™t had their work published or put in a gallery and itโ€™s not because they lack talent.  Achieving success is the culmination of a great many people and events and choices in our lives and all of them are important.

Successfully raising a child is a lot like being a success at anything.

You canโ€™t do it alone.  And I donโ€™t mean being a single parent.  There are great single parents who make it work and having both parents around doesnโ€™t guarantee success either.  I knew a couple with two kids.  Same parents.  Same household.  Same schools.  One of them grew up to be a model student.  Helped with the family, got good grades, never got in trouble.  The other one was always getting in fights; got sent to the principalโ€™s office time and time again; and started doing drugs and breaking the law.  If it was just about good parenting, it wouldnโ€™t make any sense!  But itโ€™s not. A child doesnโ€™t grow up in a bubble.  They have different friends.  They have different teachers.  They get involved in different things.  All of it adds up to the person they become. If weโ€™re lucky enough to have kids in church, we need to do all we can to be part of that formula for success.  Studies have shown the benefits of faith in a childโ€™s life. Overall, they have โ€œhigher levels of mental health, lower rates of cancer and heart disease, and significantly greater longevity and quality of life.โ€[1] They are also more likely to marry, stay married, and have better marriages.[2] As students, they tend to get better grades, less likely to drop out of school, and more likely to do their homework.[3] Who wouldnโ€™t want that for our kids?

But most drift away from their faith.

Even among kids who attended church regularly growing up, nearly two-thirds leave for at least a year or more once they move on to college or careers. Two-thirds![4]  Some of them come back, but a lot of them donโ€™t.  In our changing church landscape, there are just so many more factors that weigh into it all why it is harder than ever to get our children to come back.[5] According to the Pew Research Center, the number of unaffiliated people (meaning people with no religious affiliation) stands at 28% of the population, up 12% since 2007 when these stats started being tracked.[6]  The group that identifies as unaffiliated the most?  Millennials and Gen Z.[7]  Who knows what it will show for the kids in our churches today?  But why? Why do our kids drop out of church? The answers are many and varied. They question our teachings (60%), they donโ€™t like organized religion (47%), and they donโ€™t see a need for religion in their lives (41%) are just a few.[8] They also say things like, โ€œI find God elsewhereโ€ (39%), โ€œItโ€™s not relevant to meโ€ (35%), and โ€œChurch is boringโ€ (31%).[9]  We need to do a better job of listening to our young people and find a way to better connect them to God, because the way church is now just doesnโ€™t appeal to them. And it needs to. We live in a different age than what the world was like when we were growing up. Having a cell phone would have seemed like Star Trek come true.  In fact, when I got my first flip phone, I canโ€™t tell you the number of times I flipped it open and said, โ€œScotty, beam me up!โ€  For the church to be relevant today we need to listen with both our ears AND our eyes to try our best to retain the kids we have and help new ones know the love of Jesus. 

Maybe the solution is in the Bible all this time.

One of the toughest obstacles we have is our own unwillingness to change, but Jesus tells us in very clear words we need to do better. In Matthew, he even gives us this stern warning: โ€œTruly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.โ€  Then he followed that up with another warning, โ€œIf anyone causes one of these little onesโ€”those who believe in meโ€”to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea. (Matthew 18:3-6)โ€ Are we truly doing enough to show the love of Christ? Here is one way we can do just that. Please rise for the reading of the Word of God. 

Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates. – Deuteronomy 6:4-9

It really does take a village to raise a child.

Parents are the most important ingredient to be sure, but parents alone canโ€™t do all the work.  We are products of more than just our biology.  Friends, church, community, our nation, and our world all contribute to making us who we are. When then First Lady Hillary Clinton wrote her best-selling book with the title It Takes A Village, its purpose was to drive home this point and to inspire us to collectively take responsibility for the welfare of the children in our lives and in our world.  In the passage we just read, Moses is talking not just to parents, but to the entire nation of Israel.  โ€œImpress (Godโ€™s commandments) on your childrenโ€ฆ  Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.  Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.โ€  That word โ€œimpressโ€ is more than just โ€œteach.โ€  The dictionary defines the word as โ€œto apply with pressure so as to imprint.โ€[10]  Teaching is the transfer of information, but impression is making it part of the personโ€™s character.  In this passage, Moses is telling the people of Israel that it is our responsibility to find a way to impress upon the children the lessons of Christ and to live them out as a reminder at all times of what it means to be Christian. 

Wouldnโ€™t it be great if you ended up in someoneโ€™s โ€œthank youโ€ speech?

What an honor to be placed in that rare category of influential people upon a personโ€™s life.  If we take seriously Christโ€™s call not to hinder the little children, we also have to take seriously Mosesโ€™ call to impress upon the children the lessons of Christ.  Pray about how you can support the children of our church.  When we join, we offer our prayers, presence, gifts, service, and witness.  How can we do that for our kids? Iโ€™m reminded of a scene from The Untouchable when Eliot Ness and Jimmy Malone are talking in the church and Jimmy says to Eliot, โ€œWhat are you prepared to do?โ€  And Eliot responds with โ€œEverything within the law.โ€  Jimmy answers, โ€œAnd then what are you prepared to do?โ€  That is our challenge.  Eliot was willing to do whatever he could within the boundaries he was comfortable with, but Jimmy knew that to achieve results they would have to think out of the box.  They would have to dare to be different and find solutions that hadnโ€™t been tried yet.  Do we have that kind of commitment to our children?  It takes a village to impact the life of a child, and YOU are part of their village.  What an honor and a responsibility to be part of a childโ€™s life.


[1] David Dollahite, Loren Marks, and Savannah Love, โ€œThis is the Way: Helping Youth with Positive Religious Development,โ€ Public Square Magazine, February 26,2025, https://publicsquaremag.org/faith/american-families-of-faith/faith-parenting-raising-kids-stay-religious/ – not an endorsement for the entire article but it had good citations for research and overall the article was very good.

[2] Daniel Peterson, โ€œSociologist explains how religion benefits even atheists,โ€ Desert News, September 26, 2013, https://www.deseret.com/2013/9/26/20526274/sociologist-explains-how-religion-benefits-even-atheists/

[3] Ibid.

[4] https://research.lifeway.com/2019/01/15/most-teenagers-drop-out-of-church-as-young-adults/

[5] Daniel A. Cox, โ€œGeneration Z and the Future of Faith in America,โ€ Survey Center on American Life, March 24, 2022, https://www.americansurveycenter.org/research/generation-z-future-of-faith/#_edn2 โ€“ This article was such an interesting and well thought out piece. If youโ€™re curious why itโ€™s harder for kids to rejoin the church after a time away, itโ€™s a good read and explains how this trend is a long time coming generationally.

[6] โ€œReligious โ€˜Nonesโ€™ in America: Who They Are and What They Believe,โ€ Pew Research Center, January 24, 2024, https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2024/01/24/religious-nones-in-america-who-they-are-and-what-they-believe/ – as a side note, 2024 was the first year the number didnโ€™t go up and in fact went down slightly. Too little is known about why that change occurred to make any conclusions.  

[7] โ€œPRRI Generation Z Fact Sheet,โ€ Public Religion Research Institute, March 29, 2024, https://prri.org/spotlight/prri-generation-z-fact-sheet/

[8] โ€œWhy are โ€˜nonesโ€™ nonreligious?โ€ Pew Research  Center, January 24, 2024, https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2024/01/24/why-are-nones-nonreligious/

[9] โ€œWhat Millennials Want When They Visit Church,โ€ Barna Group, March 4, 2015, https://www.barna.com/research/what-millennials-want-when-they-visit-church/

[10] https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/impress

Why Pray?

Why pray?

I mean it never seems to work right?  The other day, I prayed for a million dollars, but I didnโ€™t get it.  When I was young, I prayed about being a doctor.  I said โ€œdoctorโ€ not โ€œpastor.โ€  However, my prayer about the Dodgers winning the World Series seems to have worked out pretty well.  Batting .333 in the majors would be considered all-star caliber hitting so maybe it works after all.  Whether or not our prayers are answered is often in the eye of the beholder.  The devout follower will undoubtedly tell you God hears us.  The skeptic will tell you they arenโ€™t sure.  And the unbeliever will say belief in the power of prayer is a fairy tale people tell themselves to feel better about living in a random and meaningless world.  But what does it mean to say that prayer โ€œworks?โ€  If our only measure of effectiveness is โ€œdid I get what I want?โ€ then probably no, it doesnโ€™t work.  God isnโ€™t a genie in a bottle who is at our beck and call. Prayer is designed differently than that.

Prayer has tons of awesome benefits beyond just creating a wish list for God.

Itโ€™s true the scientific results of intercessory prayer have been hit or miss (thatโ€™s the kind of prayer where you pray on behalf of someone else), but overall prayer has been scientifically proven to have tons of positive, tangible results.  They did a study between prayer and migraines and found that those who pray had fewer headaches and were more tolerant of pain than those who simply meditated.[1]  Specifically prayer was more effective than secular meditation.  My favorite study done by Florida State University found prayer helps in your marriage.  When at least one spouse offers petitionary prayer for the other, those couples had โ€œincreased relationship satisfaction, greater trust, cooperation, forgiveness and marital commitment. Many of these benefits apply both to the prayer as well as the one being prayed for.โ€[2]  Other studies have shown prayer can reduce stress, anxiety, and negative emotions and give you hope.[3]

Jesus never tells us to do something that doesnโ€™t help us.

Everything Jesus commands is meant to make life better both personally and as a society.ย  Prayer, gratitude, helping one another all have benefits on a micro and macro level.ย  And weโ€™re going to the garden in Gethsemane to find out more. Jesus is going off to pray to God the Father while a couple of his disciples go with him.ย  This follows immediately after the Last Supper.ย  But what I hope you focus on in this telling of the story is Jesusโ€™ purpose in praying.ย  When we discover that, I think we can best answer the question โ€œWhy pray?โ€ย 

32They went to a place called Gethsemane, and Jesus said to his disciples, “Sit here while I pray.” 33He took Peter, James and John along with him, and he began to be deeply distressed and troubled. 34“My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death,” he said to them. “Stay here and keep watch.”

 35Going a little farther, he fell to the ground and prayed that if possible the hour might pass from him. 36“Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”

 37Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. “Simon,” he said to Peter, “are you asleep? Could you not keep watch for one hour? 38Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak.”

 39Once more he went away and prayed the same thing. 40When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. They did not know what to say to him.

ย 41Returning the third time, he said to them, “Are you still sleeping and resting? Enough! The hour has come. Look, the Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. 42Rise! Let us go! Here comes my betrayer!” – Mark 14:32-42

Paul writing to the church in Thessalonica (a reproduction, not an actual photo of the event)

Praying aligns us with Godโ€™s will.

Even Jesus prays to discover what God has in store for him; thatโ€™s the power of prayer.  Itโ€™s so strong that Christ, in the most difficult moment of his life turns to the Lord in prayer to seek out his will.  Thatโ€™s not the only reason we pray, because Jesus still asks him to take this burden from him. God wants to know what is on your heart and he wants to share that burden with you.  Jesus prays, โ€œTake this cup from me.โ€  But the important part for us today is how he ends, โ€œYet not what I will, but what you will.โ€ Itโ€™s an attitude of humility and submission. It says that we donโ€™t know everything and despite our close relationship with God, we canโ€™t always escape the harsh realities of life. We turn to God in those moments to give us strength. When Jesus tells Peter, โ€œThe spirit is willing, but the body is weak,โ€ heโ€™s talking as much to them as to himself.  โ€œPray so that you will not fall into temptation.โ€ Jesus knows this from personal experience, how easy it is to do what YOU want, to avoid the hard work, to turn inward instead of toward God.  He knows the temptation of the here and now is far easier to turn toward than the distant promises of God, but Godโ€™s hope for your life and the life you are meant to lead are so much more important than the quick fix or the easy way out.  Prayer is about the constant communication between us and God to align ourselves with his will.  Itโ€™s why Paul writes in his letter to the church at Thessalonica, โ€œ16 Rejoice always, 17 pray continually, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is Godโ€™s will for you in Christ Jesus.โ€  By keeping in constant communication, we can stick to the plan God wants to share with us. 

Prayer is hard for some of us.

Even if we carve our time for it and are willing to do it, there are other hurdles in our prayer life. For some people, praying to God is like visiting the Pope. What if you say the wrong thing? What if the only prayer you know is โ€œGod is great, God is good, thank you God for this food?โ€ And praying out loud? Forget it. Iโ€™ve told you this before, but praying out loud is one of my biggest fears about being a pastor. If I forget something in a sermon, only me and God know (and our worship team since I give them my manuscript in advance). But the Lordโ€™s Prayer? Mess that one up and everyone knows. We put the words up on the screen. Whatโ€™s worse? I think about it nearly every time I do it. So of course, when you lose your concentration, youโ€™re that much more likely to mess upโ€ฆwhich has happened before.  Thankfully, since I warn people in advance that this is a fear of mine, people are usually gracious. Other fears are not knowing what to say or being afraid that your prayer isnโ€™t good enough.  But Iโ€™ll let you in on a little secret.  God doesnโ€™t care about any of that. He just wants you to pray.  Eventually, youโ€™ll figure it out for yourself.

Imagine if you have a child and your child just stopped talking to you.

How sad would you be? And they stopped talking to you for years and years.  Maybe they pick up the phone once in a while or worse โ€“ send a text asking you for money. You send it, but your heart is breaking because itโ€™s obvious you are an afterthought. You canโ€™t force them to talk to you because you hope they WANT to talk to you, not because they feel some sort of obligation. So you wait. I imagine in the story of the prodigal son that this is why God throws a party. His child has chosen on his own to reconnect to his father. Praying doesnโ€™t require anything special and if you do it long enough and with an open heart, youโ€™ll get the hang of it. Eventually, youโ€™ll find yourself talking to God in odd moments.  In the car. Right before bed. Before you have to give a presentation. Or right before doing the Lordโ€™s Prayer. โ€œGod donโ€™t let me mess this up.โ€  Thatโ€™s what Paul meant when he said โ€œpray continuously.โ€ You donโ€™t have to be on your knees every moment of the day. Instead, you find yourself simply making God a part of your life. This is the kind of prayer life God wants for you.  Not to make God feel good, but to make your life better.

If you think of prayer like a list for Santa, youโ€™ll be disappointed.

But if you look at prayer as a way to help you open up your life to where God is leading you, youโ€™ll find a lifetime of amazement. Prayer opens us up for the work of the Holy Spirit. Prayer helps soothe our fears, and to develop eyes and ears for God. As Jesus taught us, the temptations of the world are numerous, and it is all too easy to be lead away from the life God has in store for you.ย  But if we stay in contact with God through prayer, he can keep our lives on track. Prayer is a discipline and like anything else only gets better with practice.ย  Just pray and let God know youโ€™re there. There are tons of benefits to prayer.ย  Good health, longer life, less stress.ย  But the best reason to pray is to find out the peace and joy God has waiting for you.ย ย 


[1] https://health.usnews.com/health-news/articles/2008/12/22/health-prayer-should-religion-and-faith-have-roles-in-medicine?PageNr=1

[2] https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/acts-of-faith/wp/2017/08/07/frustrated-with-your-spouse-these-scientists-suggest-a-specific-kind-of-prayer/?utm_term=.ac21e2cd0468

[3] Chris Tompkins, โ€œThe Power of Prayer,โ€ Psychology Today, January 24, 2025, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lgbtq-affirmative-psychology/202501/the-power-of-prayer

Confident Humility

Confident or cocky?

They are not the same thing. I was reading an article by Michael Schein for Inc.com about the benefits of shameless self-promotion, and it made me mad.[1] While I agreed with half of his article, the other half was a recipe for all that is wrong in the world today. Never show doubt. Make enemies. Make people mad. Care at least as much about looks as about what you have to offer. Provoke people. Pull pranks. Generate hype however you can regardless of its effect. This is the perfect recipe for polarization. Does it work? Sure. But you need to ask yourself if success is worth sacrificing your morality, your honor, and your duty to caring for others. There are times when self-promotion is important and even essential. When you are trying to get a job or win over the girl of your dreams, you need to find a way to stand out, to differentiate yourself from the crowd. Putting your best foot forward, making sure they know what you have to offer is just the smart thing to do. But when it comes at the expense of others?  That should be where we draw the line.  Itโ€™s hard not to think about what Matthew wrote, โ€œWhat good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? (Matthew 16:26).

According to Michael Schein here are a few ways to shamelessly promote yourself

People often mistake being cocky for being confident.

When in fact cockiness is the opposite of confidence. Cocky people feel the need to put themselves on display all the time; to make sure people notice them, to get attention for themselves. They cover up their own deep insecurities with grandiose gestures and over-the-top attention-grabbing antics. They tell you all the time about how great they are and how they are so much better than everyone else.  Shameless self-promotion. But if you are truly at the top of your game, you donโ€™t need to do that. You find ways to lift up other people. You acknowledge you didnโ€™t do it alone. Because a confident person is secure in themselves. They arenโ€™t worried about sharing the limelight because they shine bright enough on their own. They donโ€™t need the recognition of others to feel validated because they already know they are enough.

God wants you to be confident.

God wants you to know that you are enough; that he loves you for who you are and that you should love yourself as well.  When Jesus told us that the second greatest commandment is to love your neighbor as yourself, thereโ€™s an implied assumption that we do, in fact, love ourselves.  Not in a vain, conceited way but truly loving the person we are; being satisfied and secure in ourselves. That doesnโ€™t mean we think we are perfect. Again, that would be vanity. Just that despite the work we need to do for ourselves, we know we are loved and valued. Thatโ€™s the wonder of Godโ€™s creation!  When youโ€™re in sync with God and Godโ€™s will for your life, you have that peace about you that Paul calls the โ€œpeace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7).โ€ One of my favorite ways to describe it.  โ€œThe peace that surpasses all understanding.โ€  Who wouldnโ€™t want that in their life?  When you truly love yourself, you canโ€™t help but feel confident because you know youโ€™re good enough.

Cocky people are seeking validation elsewhere.

Instead of knowing they are enough, they look to others and compare themselves constantly to validate who they are. That seems to be one of the biggest differences between being cocky and being confident. Confident people look inward and cocky people look outward. In fact, the Bible gives us a great example of this in Matthewโ€™s version of the Gospel.  If you have a Bible or a Bible app on your phone would you please find Matthew 23:1-12. When this story happens, Jesus has been challenged relentlessly from the chief priests, the Pharisees, AND the Sadducees. If he were a basketball player, I would say heโ€™s being triple-teamed in the low post! But like he normally does, Jesus is able to move and weave his way through and come out untouched.  When he does he addresses the people who have borne witness to all of this and this is where we pick up in the story.  If you would please rise as we share from the Gospel of Matthew 23:1-12.  Hear now the Word of the Lord.

Then Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples: โ€œThe teachers of the law and the Pharisees sit in Mosesโ€™ seat. So you must be careful to do everything they tell you. But do not do what they do, for they do not practice what they preach. They tie up heavy, cumbersome loads and put them on other peopleโ€™s shoulders, but they themselves are not willing to lift a finger to move them.

โ€œEverything they do is done for people to see: They make their phylacteries[a] wide and the tassels on their garments long; they love the place of honor at banquets and the most important seats in the synagogues; they love to be greeted with respect in the marketplaces and to be called โ€˜Rabbiโ€™ by others.

8ย โ€œBut you are not to be called โ€˜Rabbi,โ€™ for you have one Teacher, and you are all brothers.ย 9ย And do not call anyone on earth โ€˜father,โ€™ for you have one Father,ย and he is in heaven.ย 10ย Nor are you to be called instructors, for you have one Instructor, the Messiah.ย 11ย The greatest among you will be your servant.ย 12ย For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted. – Matthew 23:1-12

Jesus poses a threat to all of these religious leaders.

The chief priests, the Pharisees, and the Sadducees are insecure because they know from Scripture that one day a savior will come and they would rightfully lose their power. They should want this! If it happens it means the savior is amongst them!  What an incredible honor to be witness to something so monumental! They should not just be willing but happy to give away their status to be in the presence of God. But they have defined their existence by the power they wield and they are so insecure without it.  So instead of embracing Jesus, they do a full court press to discredit him. Jesus points out to the crowd that everything they do is for validation. They desire recognition. They want people to give them respect. They need to be called โ€˜Rabbiโ€™ and take the seat of honor. Because they only feel good about themselves by lording their power over others.  So, to lose it would mean losing themselves. It would be sad if they werenโ€™t trying to kill Jesus. And thatโ€™s why Jesus offers that line of wisdom at the end, โ€œFor those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.โ€

Thatโ€™s the thing about cocky people.

Or anyone who elevates themselves above others. Eventually, they get found out. Cocky people have a false sense of their own abilities.[2] They like to think they are better than they are and because of that, they tend to believe there is no need to improve. I mean, why improve upon perfection? And eventually they become humbled. Youโ€™re probably saying to yourself you know plenty of cocky people who never seem to be humbled and youโ€™re right. But they are often humbled in the eyes of others. People turn their backs on them. They finally see through the hype and bravado. And so, without even realizing it they lose influence on those around them. Confident people, on the other hand, are often humble. Which probably doesnโ€™t make sense on the surface, but the confidence they possess gives them the security to be vulnerable, to lift others up. They donโ€™t need to take credit for achievements. They donโ€™t need the accolades to feel good about themselves. Instead, they share the praise and credit with others because they are know they are enough.

Ultimately, itโ€™s the difference between being broken and being made whole.

You know the saying, โ€œHurt people hurt people?โ€ Iโ€™ve been hearing that a lot lately and I think it is Godโ€™s not so subtle way of saying we need to explore this together. Cocky people are hurt people. Vain and arrogant people are hurt people. They are seeking validation from others because they donโ€™t feel it within. And the way they feel better about themselves is by comparing themselves to others. Someone who is proud or cocky says, โ€œI did this.โ€ย  Someone who is confident and humble says, โ€œIโ€™m glad to be a part of this.โ€ย  God wants us to be confident, not cocky. We need to work on ourselves to make sure we donโ€™t slip from one to the other. The key is to โ€œadopt a growth mindset.โ€[3] To be open to the possibility you are not perfect. To be willing to constantly improve your knowledge and be open to new ideas. If you acknowledge you have a way to go to be better, you find yourself more humble and more willing to listen to others and that will help give you the right mindset that God wants for us all.ย  We can make the world a better place, but it starts with each one of us. Let us always stay true to the people God wants us to be.


[1] Michael Shein, โ€œA Little Shameless Self-Promotion Can Be a Good Thing โ€“ as Long as You Follow These 10 Rules,โ€ Inc.com, Jan 24, 2018, https://www.inc.com/michael-schein/the-10-commandments-of-shameless-self-promotio.html

[2] Enya Eettickal, โ€œCocky or Confident?โ€ The Case Western Reserve Observer, February 17, 2023, https://observer.case.edu/cocky-or-confident/

[3] โ€œ#1 Confidence Imposter: Cocky,โ€ American Confidence Institute, Accessed on May 15, 2026, https://www.americanconfidenceinstitute.com/blog/confidence-imposter-cocky

Multiple Choice Christianity

When was the last time you tried to argue your way out of trouble?

Growing up I was a big fan of the Brady Bunch, probably because I had an equally big crush on Marcia. There were lots of memorable episodes. Peterโ€™s voice changing. Bobby running away. The mystery of Kitty Karry-All (whatever happened to Tiger anyway?). So many memories. One lesson that stuck with me from the show was in an episode called โ€œGreg Gets Grounded.โ€ Oldest son Greg nearly crashes the family station wagon because heโ€™s reading the jacket cover of his new album while driving and ends up getting grounded from using the car for a week. But Greg, who has a big date that weekend finds a loophole and borrows a friendโ€™s car instead. As usual, Mr. and Mrs. Brady find out, but Greg argues with his dad and says, โ€œI didnโ€™t disobey you.  Your exact words were that I couldnโ€™t drive OUR car, but you didnโ€™t say anything about driving someone elseโ€™s car.โ€  Mr. Brady says, โ€œGreg, you knew what we meant when we grounded you.โ€  But Greg argues, โ€œYeah, but Dad those werenโ€™t your EXACT words.โ€  Mr. Brady, in a very sly move, decides to let Greg off the hook by instead making his son live by โ€œhis exact words.โ€  Needless to say, after doing chores at 11:00 at night, Greg finds out VERY quickly that living by the letter of the law isnโ€™t all itโ€™s cracked up to be and admits he was wrong. 

Doing what’s right is more important than doing what’s allowed as Greg soon learns.

Living by โ€œexact wordsโ€ isnโ€™t all itโ€™s cracked up to be.

And like Greg, we use it as an excuse for not doing the right thing. A very sad and tragic story happened about a nurse in Bakersfield all the way back in 2013 but one that drives this point home. Colleen, a nurse in Bakersfield, used the excuse to sit by while an elderly woman died.[1]  Literally sat by and watched while a woman was dying on the dining room floor of a senior living complex.  Apparently, an 87-year old woman named Lorraine Bayless collapsed to the ground and Colleen called 911 to get help.  The operator, realizing the seriousness of the situation, told the nurse that someone needed to administer CPR to Ms. Bayless and the nurse refused citing company policy as her excuse.  The operator pleaded with Colleen to do it to save her life and if not her, then to hand the phone to someone who might.  Colleen refused.  Literally refused.  But perhaps the most disturbing part of the call was when the 911 operator asked her, โ€œIs there anyone thatโ€™s willing to help this lady and not let her die?โ€ And in what seemed to be a very cold and callous reaction, the nurse said, โ€œUm, not at this time.โ€[2]   Her adherence to the โ€œrulesโ€ was so great that she allowed a fellow human being to die right in front of her without so much as lifting a finger beyond calling 911.  Whatโ€™s worse she was a nurse and still refused to do anything because of the โ€œrules.โ€  She wouldnโ€™t even pass the phone to someone else or look for someone who might be willing to do what she wouldnโ€™t and Lorraine died.

Was she following the spirit of those โ€œexact words?โ€

Too often our โ€œexact wordsโ€ become weapons or shields against others, but this isnโ€™t their intent.ย  The intent of the law and the intent of rules are to lay down a guideline to better living.ย  But they are NOT meant to be used as instruments or tools to harm others.ย  Yet throughout our history, we have done exactly that โ€“ we have used the law as a means to an end instead of adhering to the spirit in which it was made. We hear about one such case in our reading of the Bible today.ย  This will probably be a very familiar story if youโ€™ve been in church for a while.ย  Itโ€™s often referred to as the story of the adulterous woman, but that isnโ€™t really fair to her.ย  It should be called โ€œThe Pharisees are at it again,โ€ but I guess that happens so much they need to differentiate it somehow. Once again, they try to trip Jesus up โ€“ trying to get him to contradict the Word of God so they have a reason to get rid of him.ย  And this isnโ€™t the only time they do this.ย  At various points in the Gospels they try to trap Jesus with their clever questions and arguments. And this time is no different. In this passage they question Jesus about this woman who commits adultery and this is where we pick up in the Gospel narrative.ย 

At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group and said to Jesus, โ€œTeacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?โ€ They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.

But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, โ€œLet any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.โ€ Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. 10 Jesus straightened up and asked her, โ€œWoman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?โ€

11 โ€œNo one, sir,โ€ she said.

โ€œThen neither do I condemn you,โ€ Jesus declared. โ€œGo now and leave your life of sin.โ€ – John 8:2-11

Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.

Jesus didnโ€™t sidestep the law.  He didnโ€™t contradict the law.  Instead he improved upon the law and said, โ€œLet any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.โ€  And they were stuck.  None of them qualified and they knew it.  They were hoping Jesus would say something they could hang him on, something that showed he really was either a heretic or a lunatic, but instead Jesus turns the tables on them.  He doesnโ€™t deny that this woman broke their laws and customs, but instead says in his own way that only someone who is sinless has the right to stand in judgment and if a sinless person was found who thought she deserved this punishment then it would be justified.  Ironically, Jesus is the only sinless person.  So one by one, they go away and Jesus instead of seeking justice offers mercy.  โ€œNeither do I condemn you,โ€ he tells the woman, โ€œGo now and leave your life of sin.โ€

Jesus had every right to throw the book at her.

Or a stone.  She violated the law and the law demanded punishment.  But as the only one worthy of issuing that punishment, Jesus chose instead the path of love and grace and mercy.  As it says in Hosea 6:6 and again in Matthew, โ€œFor I desire mercy, not sacrifice, and acknowledgement of God rather than burnt offerings.โ€  This is the kind of God we worship.  One who is more interested in grace than condemnation, hope instead of harm.  He makes it really easy to understand, too.  Love God, love your neighbor.  Very simple rules.  And we twist those rules and use them as a battering ram against people who donโ€™t believe exactly what we believe.

In the past, the Bible has been misused to justify offenses of the worst kind.

Itโ€™s been used as a tool to justify racism, sexism, spousal abuse, homophobia, destruction of the environment, destruction of basic freedoms, and other horrific tragedies, and yet it is clear by simply reading the Bible that God wishes for none of these things.  They are inconsistent with everything we know about God.  So how do they justify it?  They engage in Multiple Choice Christianity.  They pick and choose what parts of the Bible they like to fit their beliefs. You take a passage from column A and a passage from column B and you come up with some derivation of Scripture that suits your needs.  But as H.G. Wells once said, โ€œSatan delights equally in statistics and quoting Scripture.โ€[3]  Because like statistics, you can shape and bend Scripture to say almost anything when you choose to ignore the facts.  God doesnโ€™t make it hard to understand and yet too often Christians have done a good job of twisting the message and life of Christ into a pretzel.  But the message is simple: love God, love others.  Love God, love others.  This is the greatest commandment and as Jesus said, all the rest rely on these two things. 

Can you believe it? Graphics from factourism.com

When I first moved to Georgia, I had a hard time finding my way around. 

Everything was named โ€œPeachtree.โ€  Youโ€™d think they could come up with some original names for streets.  There was Peachtree Ave, Peachtree Street, Peachtree Circle, Peachtree Battle (I donโ€™t know how you end up naming a street Peachtree โ€œBattleโ€), Peachtree Road, Peachtree Blvd, Peachtree Industrial Pkwy, and thatโ€™s just to name a few.  Needless to say I needed a map.  I didnโ€™t have a GPS and so I was often driving around the city with one eye on the road and one eye on my map.  Well, I guess this particular day my one eye missed the streetlight that was red.  There were these two stoplights in a row and the first one was green and the second one, only a little farther away was red.  And I just went right through that second light.  Completely oblivious, I kept driving and out of my rear-view mirror, I see this police car with its lights on.  I pull over like a good driver, not wanting to cause any trouble, and the policeman pulls over with me.  Iโ€™m totally shocked.  That is until the officer comes up and says to me, โ€œDid you notice that you ran through a red light?โ€  I told him, โ€œNo, sir.  I didnโ€™t see it.โ€  I look back and sure enough there was a second light.  I felt doomed.  Not even a week in my new city and already in trouble with the law.  But then the officer did something completely unexpected.  He said, โ€œYouโ€™re new around here, arenโ€™t you?โ€ I nodded. โ€œWell, next time be extra careful.  That light can be pretty hard to see.  Welcome to Georgia.  Have a nice day.โ€  Grace is much more powerful than the law.  It has an effect that goes far beyond the moment.  Remember, it isnโ€™t about adhering to โ€œexact words.โ€ Itโ€™s all about doing the right thing.  So do the right thing.  In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.  Amen. 


[1] http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/headlines/2013/03/elderly-woman-dies-after-nurse-refuses-to-give-her-cpr/

[2] http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013/03/04/partial-transcript-11-call-from-calif-senior-living-facility-where-woman-died/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+foxnews%2Fnational+%28Internal+-+US+Latest+-+Text%29

[3] http://www.quotegarden.com/statistics.html

Gold, Silver, Bronze

Sometimes a race is simply too close to call.

Back in 2016, I was watching the Olympics, and I remember thinking we need new standards on who wins and who doesnโ€™t.  When Katie Ledecky won the 800m freestyle by nearly 12 seconds she obviously deserved the gold medal. Maybe two. But on the other end of the spectrum, youโ€™ve got Mahe Drysdale of New Zealand winning the menโ€™s single scull rowing competition over Damir Martin by one-one-thousandth of a second![1]  One-one-thousandth of a second!  The official time for both rowers was exactly the same on the official clock, so they had to go to a photo and Drysdale literally won by a centimeter. A centimeter!  Drysdale set a new Olympic record, and Martin went home with the silver. Somehow seems unfair. Without computers, they certainly would have called it a tie, and both men deservedly would go home with the gold, and no one would have complained. But now, Drysdale is a gold medalist and Martin is not. Jerry Seinfeld had a great comedy routine about the silver medal. He said, โ€œI think Iโ€™d rather come in last than win the silver.  You win the gold, you feel good.  You win the bronze, you think, โ€˜Well at least I won something.โ€™  You win the silver itโ€™s like, โ€˜Congratulations! Youโ€ฆalmost won.  Of all the losers, you came in first of that group.  Youโ€™re the number one loser.  No one lost ahead of you.โ€™โ€ You had to feel for Damir Martin. To lose by such a small margin he must have been thinking, โ€œIf I had done ANYTHING different, I could have won! Maybe I shouldnโ€™t have eaten that donut.โ€ Iโ€™m sure he didnโ€™t eat a donut before the race, but you get it.  Still, our culture is obsessed with winning. We keep coming up with new technology to make sure we know.  No more ties in competition. There has to be a winner. But why? When it is THAT close, so close we canโ€™t tell with the human eye, why do we insist on declaring a winner?

One centimeter. If the camera snapped the photo incorrectly, who knows?

The answer is simple: We like feeling superior.

We find value in comparing ourselves to others, and maybe thatโ€™s the real problem.ย  Not being enough on our own.ย  President Teddy Roosevelt once called comparison โ€œthe thief of joyโ€ and it certainly can be.[2] Do you like yourself?ย  Or do you constantly find yourself comparing your life to those around you?ย  Itโ€™s one of the real drawbacks of social media because youโ€™re comparing yourself to a false reality. Hereโ€™s a weird statistic for you, โ€œfor every selfie we see, around 10 attempts at that selfie have been made.โ€[3] Anyone can make life look good in ten second segments. Itโ€™s not like when I was growing up and you had to literally pay for every photo you took. You couldnโ€™t check it immediately to see if it turned out good.ย  Nope. You had to pay for that little gem, and the moment was long over before you found out that it was completely out of focus. But even without social media, when we define ourselves by those around us, it can be unhealthy. Basically, there are two types of comparison โ€“ upward and downward โ€“ and they are likely what youโ€™d expect.ย 

Both can have positive impacts, but also very negative ones if we are not aware.

Upward comparison is when we look at others who we perceive to be doing better than us. In moderation it might inspire us to do better or work harder, but it can also lead to increased anxiety and stress, low self-esteem and depression, burnout, and dissatisfaction with life.[4] For today though, we are going to focus on the other one, the one that doesnโ€™t get talked about as much โ€“ downward comparison.ย Downward comparison is when we look at someone else who we perceive to be doing worse than us or behaving more badly than we are and taking satisfaction from being โ€œbetter than them.โ€ This kind of comparison might make you feel grateful for the life you have, but it can also give you a false sense of superiority and make you less empathic to those around you.[5] And thatโ€™s where our half-truth for the day comes in.ย  โ€œLove the sinner. Hate the sin.โ€ย  On the surface it sounds all well and good right?ย  God tells us many times we need to love one another, so this seems like a reminder to separate the person from the act. Well, if thatโ€™s all it was then maybe it would be okay, but in reality, when we actually SAY these words we are doing exactly what the Pharisee is doing in our passage today.ย 

To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable: 10 โ€œTwo men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11 The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: โ€˜God, I thank you that I am not like other peopleโ€”robbers, evildoers, adulterersโ€”or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.โ€™

13 โ€œBut the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, โ€˜God, have mercy on me, a sinner.โ€™

14ย โ€œI tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.โ€ – Luke 18:9-14

At least Iโ€™m not like him.

Have you ever caught yourself thinking something like that?  You hear about someone in the news who was caught stealing, or cheating, or hurting someone and thereโ€™s a part of you, a part you probably donโ€™t even say out loud that whispers, โ€œWell, at least Iโ€™m not like him.โ€  And thatโ€™s what is going on in this story. These two guys are going up to the temple to pray, and the Pharisee makes sure to keep his distance.  He doesnโ€™t want to be seen with a TAX COLLECTOR (insert your preferred most hated profession here).  The Pharisee stands apart from him and prays this prayer: โ€œGod, I thank you that I am not like other peopleโ€”robbers, evildoers, adulterersโ€”or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.โ€ Amen. The Pharisee doesnโ€™t admit to any wrongdoing.  He doesnโ€™t confess to any sins.  He simply says, โ€œat least Iโ€™m better than THIS guy.โ€  Meanwhile, the tax collector, who probably feels unworthy to even be in the temple, simply asks for forgiveness, and Jesus said that it was the tax collector God was pleased with.  Sure, the Pharisee followed the rules.  He fasted.  He gave his tithe.  But he did it as much for himself as for God.  The tax collector had humility in his heart and thatโ€™s who God was pleased with.

Pride is what gets between us and God.

Thatโ€™s what was wrong with the Pharisee.  His pride.  โ€œAt least Iโ€™m not as bad as THAT guy.โ€  Itโ€™s that arrogance, that judgmental attitude, to dare to elevate yourself above others that did him in.  When we compare ourselves to others like that, itโ€™s an attempt on our part to mitigate our own sin, our own faults, to say that even though I know Iโ€™m not perfect, there are other people much worse than I am out there God so you should be happy with me.  But God doesnโ€™t care about that.  God cares about YOU.  Thatโ€™s why in Romans it says, โ€œfor all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.โ€  Because it doesnโ€™t matter if youโ€™re a little better or a lot better than the next guy.  Godโ€™s concern is with YOU.  God is concerned about YOUR heart.  As Jesus said earlier, we need to take the plank out of our own eye before worrying about the speck in our brotherโ€™s eye (Matthew 7:3-5).  So when we say, โ€œLove the sinner, hate the sin,โ€ we presume that the OTHER person is the sinner.  Itโ€™s the OTHER person who needs some help.  Not us.  In his book Half Truth, Adam Hamilton says, โ€œWhen โ€˜Love the sinnerโ€™ is our mantra, weโ€™ve put ourselves in a position of seeing others as sinners rather than neighborsโ€ฆI think what turns people off is when religious people point out the sins of others but act as though they have no sins of their own.โ€[6]  We might admit to having sins, but there is this air about us when we start acting judgmental of others that somehow our sins are not as bad as someone elseโ€™s. 

We make the mistake of thinking that life is a zero-sum game.

And that at the end of it, some of us are going to Heaven and some of us are not and all we have to do is finish ahead of the other guy to get there. I think about this a lot when Iโ€™m watching the Great British Baking Show. You donโ€™t have to win Star Baker every week to win the whole thing.ย  You really only have to win it once โ€“ at the end.ย  The rest of the time you just have to finish ahead of the other guy to make it.ย  I think we approach life like that at times.ย  Itโ€™s why we donโ€™t take how we behave and how we care about others more seriously.ย  Itโ€™s the thought that if I do enough good deeds, Iโ€™ll make it.ย  I donโ€™t really have to believe in anything.ย  I donโ€™t really have to read the Bible.ย  I donโ€™t really have to go to church.ย  I just have to prove that Iโ€™m better than the next guy and Iโ€™ll get into Heaven.ย  And thatโ€™s what is dangerous.ย  As soon as we do that, as soon as we start comparing ourselves to one another, we lower the bar.ย  We keep playing for the minimum amount of effort.ย  We sleep soundly at night not because weโ€™ve done a stellar job of loving our neighbor but because we turn on the news and at least half of those people are way worse than us.ย  But that isnโ€™t how God expects us to behave and we dishonor God by comparing ourselves to each other. The biggest mistake we make is assuming life is a zero-sum game.ย  Godโ€™s intention, his desire, is for everyone to come to him.ย  In 2 Peter 3:9, Peter tells us, โ€œThe Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.โ€ Remember that. God doesn’t care about how you compare.ย  What he DOES care about that no medal or prize or award can ever give is the goodness in your heart.ย  That isnโ€™t something you can measure against other people.ย  Itโ€™s something that is between you and God.ย 

Hamilton tells a great story about how we SHOULD act toward one another.

He wrote, โ€œSome time ago I read an interview with Billy Grahamโ€™s eldest daughter, Gigi.ย  She was her fatherโ€™s date to Time magazineโ€™s seventy-fifth anniversary party, a banquet in Washington, DC.ย  President Bill Clinton spoke at the event.ย  He had just been impeached by the House of Representatives for perjury and obstruction of justice.ย  The charge of perjury involved what President Clinton had said, under oath, about his relationship with White House intern Monica Lewinsky.ย  At the banquet, her father sat with President and Mrs. Clinton.ย  He was warm and gracious to them.ย  After the dinner ended and Graham and Gigi were riding back to their hotel, the two discussed difficulties the president and First Lady were going through with so many people gossiping and judging.ย  Gigi said her fatherโ€™s simple comment was, โ€˜Itโ€™s the Holy Spiritโ€™s job to convict; itโ€™s Godโ€™s job to judge; and itโ€™s our job to love.โ€™โ€[7] A simple but powerful reminder of what we were created to do. Matthew 22: โ€œโ€˜Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.โ€™[a] 38ย This is the first and greatest commandment. 39ย And the second is like it: โ€˜Love your neighbor as yourself.โ€™โ€

In case you wanted to see Jerry’s routine for yourself.
And if you were curious about how close that final race was…

[1] https://www.buzzfeed.com/carolinekee/rio-close-finish?utm_term=.ma4495g4p#.heXbn3Db4

[2] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/social-comparison-theory

[3] https://www.stylist.co.uk/life/comparing-ourselves-to-others-comparison-culture-research-self-esteem-instagram-social-media-success-careers-fitness-relationships/345725

[4] https://www.desertwillowbh.com/blog/the-danger-of-comparison-how-measuring-your-success-against-others-affects-mental-health and also https://www.calm.com/blog/social-comparison-theory

[5] https://www.calm.com/blog/social-comparison-theory

[6] Adam Hamilton, Half Truths, p. 153.

[7] Ibid, p.159.

Help Wanted!

โ€œI know Iโ€™m about to win! Iโ€™m so close!โ€

In the back of mind, I can still hear myself saying those words as my friends Lance, Gene, Murali, and Rich dragged me away from the video poker machines in Tahoe.ย  It was the first time Iโ€™d ever gone into a casino. Iโ€™d played penny poker with my friends before, but this was real money and it was exciting! The first time I won and heard those coins clinking into the tray made my heart race as the prospect of suddenly becoming rich seemed so close.ย  How easy it all seemed to be!ย  Pretty soon I went from playing one nickel to five without realizing it.ย  Soon, money was bleeding from my pockets.ย  I had planned to spend only $20 on gambling and already I had spent twice that, but I KNEW that big jackpot was right around the corner!ย  I KNEW IT!!!ย  Now, I was betting with food money.ย  But before I started thinking about selling my clothes to the pawn shop, my friends came over and pulled me away.ย  โ€œDude, forget about it.ย  Letโ€™s go.โ€ย  โ€œBut Iโ€™m so CLOSE.โ€ย  I actually said those words.ย  โ€œIโ€™m SO CLOSE!โ€ โ€œYou canโ€™t win dude (remember this was the โ€˜80s โ€“ there were a lot of โ€˜dudesโ€™).ย  Itโ€™s set up for you to lose.โ€ย  โ€œBut I know Iโ€™m going to win big!โ€ My friends told me they were leaving and they had the car so I had to go, but it was so hard to leave that seat.ย  I realized later how I had been blinded by the allure of BIG MONEY!ย  Yes, even from a nickel video poker machine. If it hadnโ€™t been for my friends, I might have starved the rest of the trip.ย  I needed them without even realizing it.ย 

Thanks to these buddies, I didn’t lose my lunch money.

Sometimes life is like that.ย  We need more help than we realize.

We get caught up in the middle of something and we get lost in it.ย  Or we find ourselves in a situation we think we can handle but pretty soon youโ€™re overwhelmed like an ocean wave capturing you by surprise. Have you ever felt that?ย  That feeling of being at the mercy of something you canโ€™t even see.ย  The first time a wave caught me by surprise, I was sure I could handle it, but the tide was much stronger than I thought and pretty soon Iโ€™m tumbling head over heels.ย  I tried to put my feet down in the sand, but literally couldnโ€™t tell which way was up. It was scary. We get caught in situations like that, thankfully not too often. Situations that creep up on us before we even know it.ย  The sudden death of a loved one.ย  A relationship coming to an end.ย  A scary diagnosis from the doctor.ย  And about the worst thing you can say in those moments? โ€œGod doesnโ€™t give you more than you can handle.โ€

I know itโ€™s said with the best of intentions.

Someone, probably someone you love, is trying to give you hope and letting you know that youโ€™ll get through this okay.ย  But will you?ย  What happens if you donโ€™t get through this okay?ย  Is that your fault?ย  Like the phrase โ€œEverything happens for a reason,โ€ this one is fraught with many of the same problems.ย  It implies God DID this, whatever this is.ย  God did this TO YOU.ย  God gave you this problem, this tragedy, this situation.ย  Just because God thinks you can handle it?ย  Whether we can handle it or not, we would rightly question a cruel God who would make us go through pain and suffering JUST because โ€œwe can handle it.โ€ย  And the truth is, not everyone can. According to the World Health Organization over 700,000 people commit suicide every year. If God doesnโ€™t give us more than we can handle, then why are there people who canโ€™t handle it? ย Even pastors arenโ€™t immune.ย  In a study of Protestant pastors from the Barna Group, they found nearly 1 in 5 have at least had thoughts of suicide or self-harm in the past year.ย  One in 10 had at least occasional thoughts of it and thankfully only 1% were severe.ย  Not even pastors are immune.ย 

If you ever feeling like harming yourself or others, please seek help right away. You can always call the Suicide and Crisis Prevention hotline by dialing 988.

So where does this idea come from?

Like many false beliefs it comes from the Bible.ย  Or to be more precise a bad interpretation of the Bible. Weโ€™re going to read this morning from 1 Corinthians 10:1-13 so if you have a Bible or a Bible app with you, this is Paulโ€™s letter to the church at Corinth in the New Testament.ย  1 Corinthians 10:1-13.ย  It started with Job.ย  In Job, God allows Satan to tempt Job away from his faith in God but to no avail.ย  Despite the numerous tragedies that are heaped upon Job, Job remains Godโ€™s faithful servant.ย  But what most people donโ€™t know is that the Book of Job is not a true story.ย  This isnโ€™t meant to be historical literature like 1 and 2 Kings or the Gospel of Luke.ย  Instead itโ€™s meant to convey an idea about God through story. The Book of Job is more akin to an expanded Aesop fable than it is to the historical literature.ย  But because most people donโ€™t know that they treat Job as if it happened word for word.ย  And it becomes this ultimate example of God not giving us more than we can handle.ย  But itโ€™s just not true.ย  The story is meant to show us the power of faith through difficult times and how faith in God and trust in God can give us strength.ย  Itโ€™s not meant to say we will never be overwhelmed with what happens to us in life.ย  We canโ€™t all be Job, nor are we supposed to be. In the same way, this passage from 1 Corinthians is meant to encourage us in times of difficulty but itโ€™s been taken to mean the same thing, โ€œGod doesnโ€™t give us more than we can handle.โ€ย  If you would please rise as youโ€™re able, we are going to read this morning from 1 Corinthians 10:1-13.ย  Hear now the Word of God.

Love these images by Kids Bible Teacher!

For I do not want you to be ignorant of the fact, brothers and sisters, that our ancestors were all under the cloud and that they all passed through the sea. 2ย They were all baptized into Moses in the cloud and in the sea. 3ย They all ate the same spiritual food 4ย and drank the same spiritual drink; for they drank from the spiritual rock that accompanied them, and that rock was Christ. 5ย Nevertheless, God was not pleased with most of them; their bodies were scattered in the wilderness.

6ย Now these things occurred as examples to keep us from setting our hearts on evil things as they did. 7ย Do not be idolaters, as some of them were; as it is written: โ€œThe people sat down to eat and drink and got up to indulge in revelry.โ€ 8ย We should not commit sexual immorality, as some of them didโ€”and in one day twenty-three thousand of them died. 9ย We should not test Christ, as some of them didโ€”and were killed by snakes. 10ย And do not grumble, as some of them didโ€”and were killed by the destroying angel.

11ย These things happened to them as examples and were written down as warnings for us, on whom the culmination of the ages has come. 12ย So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you donโ€™t fall! 13ย No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it. โ€“ 1 Corinthians 10:1-13

โ€œHe will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.โ€

Thatโ€™s the troubling line.ย  โ€œHe will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.โ€ Thatโ€™s where we get this idea that God doesnโ€™t give us more than we can handle, but the differences here are subtle and significant and thatโ€™s why I wanted to read the whole passage to you. When you read it in its entirety, you get a clearer picture of whatโ€™s happening.ย  In the church at Corinth, they werenโ€™t struck with some catastrophe and now Paul is writing to them with words of condolence.ย  They werenโ€™t going through a time of difficulty and Paul is trying to give them hope.ย  Itโ€™s the people willfully walking away from God for the next best thing.ย  They are being tempted to walk away from their faith, and Paul is comparing that to what happened in the past to the people of Israel. The people of Israel were tempted by the next shiny object like New Age crystals or numerology and turned to those things instead of God.ย  The people of Israel saw other religions who offered them promises that seemed more appealing like prosperity preachers today who tell you if you only have enough faith then you will be rich here on this earth.ย  Thatโ€™s the kind of temptation Paul is saying is not more than we can bear. Paul is reminding them not to fall prey to hucksters and scam artists and false prophets who are trying to lead them away from God. ย This isnโ€™t a commentary by Paul about tragedy and hardship. Because Paul knows about tragedy and hardship.ย  He even gives a list of them in the Bible including being whipped five times, beaten with rods, stoned, imprisoned, shipwrecked three times!ย  Cold, naked, hungry and thirsty.ย  Paul has seen it all. But this warning we are reading isnโ€™t about God not giving you more than you can handle.ย  Itโ€™s a plea for the church to keep their faith and to turn to God in our troubles.

God is waiting for us to put out a โ€œHelp Wantedโ€ sign on our lives.

To acknowledge that we canโ€™t do it alone.ย  God stands ready to help, to offer us solutions, to give us alternatives, to put people in our lives who can support and guide us โ€“ but we still have to acknowledge we need it.ย  In his book Half Truths, Adam Hamilton writes, โ€œThe promise of Scripture is not that we wonโ€™t go through hard timesโ€ฆWhat Scripture does promise is that at all times, good or bad, God wants to be our help and our strength.โ€ย  Thatโ€™s the key.ย  We WILL go through hard times.ย  There will be times when its more than we can bear.ย  But we donโ€™t have to make that journey alone.ย  If you havenโ€™t made the decision to turn your life over to God or if its something youโ€™ve been struggling with, I want to encourage you to do so.ย  To be open to the possibility that there is a God in Heaven who really does want to help.ย  That his help may come in ways you are not expecting.ย  A friendly voice, a kind gesture, a mysterious note, or even an email.ย  Iโ€™ve found that in each instance where I truly surrendered myself to God, something has happened. Itโ€™s not always what I expected (in fact it almost never is), but something happens and I know that Godโ€™s hand was in it.ย  God doesnโ€™t test us in the way we often think.ย  I donโ€™t think God sets up situations to see if we are faithful.ย  I think things happen to us and God hopes that instead of turning to something else we seek his guidance and his help.ย  Like I said, it may not always turn out the way we want, but if we are willing to go down the path God is taking us it can often be ย better than we imagine.ย  In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.ย  Amen.ย 

Que Sera Sera

โ€œEverything happens for a reason.โ€

Youโ€™ve probably heard that saying before.  You might even believe it.  Itโ€™s kind of the โ€œgo toโ€ quip people use when they donโ€™t know what to say when something sad or tragic occurs. โ€œEverything happens for a reason.โ€  I guess we hope itโ€™s true because then it makes sense of something awful, as if there was a purpose to why it happened. It gives us comfort to think whatever happened wasnโ€™t pointless. We use other sayings, too. โ€œIt was meant to be.โ€ โ€œIt was his time.โ€  But does everything really happen for a reason?  And what does that mean if it does?  Whenever we use superlatives like โ€œeverythingโ€ and โ€œalwaysโ€ we should be prepared to have an ounce of skepticism.  As you probably already know, rarely is anything that definitive.  The same is true for this.  Not everything happens for a reason. 

Well-meaning Christians have been popping out sayings like this for a long time.

But it isnโ€™t grounded in anything that makes sense.  It might seem comforting on the surface, but when you think about it, it just doesnโ€™t hold water. When we tell someone โ€œEverything happens for a reason,โ€ weโ€™re essentially saying God caused it to happen.  That it was God that caused them to die or to suffer or go through some unimaginable pain. When I was in high school, my high school chemistry teacher, Mr. McNally, died in a tragic car accident.  He was hit by a drunk driver and thankfully his son survived the crash.  But Mr. McNally died.  His life was suddenly over.  A much beloved teacher who had inspired many of his students was ripped away from his family, his friends, and his students in a moment.  The drunk driver however, not only survived but walked away from the accident.  It just made no sense, especially to a bunch of 10th graders.  And in those instances people rely on tropes and quips and easy pithy statements so they donโ€™t have to answer the tough questions.  โ€œEverything happens for a reason.โ€  But you have to ask yourself, is that really true? Did we all have to suffer and lose a good person who made the world brighter in service to some grand plan?  Or was this just some irresponsible idiot who got behind the wheel when he shouldnโ€™t have? 

How we understand the answer to that makes all the difference in the world.

When we say โ€œEverything happens for a reason,โ€ weโ€™re really saying God controls our actions and that poses two problems โ€“ our responsibility and Godโ€™s responsibility.  Saying God controls everything poses two problems โ€“ our responsibility and Godโ€™s responsibilityWe have none and God has it all.  Adam Hamilton, in his book Half Truth, wrote โ€œIf I drink and drive and someone is killed as a result, it must have been the victimโ€™s โ€˜time.โ€™  Yes, I did a terrible thing, but the devil didnโ€™t make me do it.  Instead, God used me to accomplish some greater purpose.  I cannot be held responsible for my actions.  I was only doing what God willed me to do.โ€[1]  And if we really believe everything happens for a reason, we believe this to be true.  We are only carrying out Godโ€™s will no matter how hurtful, how obscene, or how violent it may be.  Hitler?  Godโ€™s fault.  Terrorism?  Godโ€™s fault.  Cancer?  Godโ€™s fault.  Itโ€™s all Godโ€™s fault.  Which makes the problem of โ€œEverything happens for a reasonโ€ clear โ€“ itโ€™s all Godโ€™s fault.  Every horrible thing, every horrible person, every horrible choice that happens in the world is Godโ€™s fault and since we have absolutely no responsibility, why worry about it?  Why stress over what we should do next?  After all it isnโ€™t OUR fault.  Itโ€™s what I like to call the โ€œQue Sera Seraโ€ philosophy โ€“ whatever will be, will be so itโ€™s not my problem and itโ€™s not my fault.

But is that true?

Seems like a horrible way to create the world.  If human beings have no agency, no freedom, then arenโ€™t we all just puppets dancing around for Godโ€™s enjoyment?  And is that any way to live?  Some people do believe we have very little control, if any, over our actions. Itโ€™s a theology called Calvinism or Reformed Christianity and it says God has already decided everything that will ever happen in the history of the world.  As Hamilton points out, John Calvin, whom the movement was named after, believed that since God was completely sovereign then โ€œAbsolutely everythingโ€ฆ happens by Godโ€™s will and command.โ€[2] โ€œIf something happens that is not Godโ€™s willโ€ฆthen God does not in fact have dominion over everything,โ€ and that would run counter to Calvinโ€™s beliefs.[3]  In Calvinโ€™s point of view, human beings really are merely puppets of God whoโ€™s every action is caused by God.  Your breathing at this very moment is caused by God.  God didnโ€™t merely make it possible; he coordinated and orchestrated it.  And if Calvin is right, then everything does happen for a reason.

As Methodists, we donโ€™t believe this to be true.

We believe in free will.ย  We believe God allows us to choose our path.ย  We believe God created us not to be puppets but to be free creatures.ย I always think of this bookmark I had as a kid that said, โ€œIf you love something set it free.ย  If it comes back to you, itโ€™s yours.ย  If it doesnโ€™t it was never yours to begin with.โ€ย  Itโ€™s an idiom, but within every idiom is a kernel of truth.ย  God sets us free because he hopes we will come to him of our own free will.ย  He wants us to CHOOSE him, because can you say itโ€™s love if there is no free will?ย  Is there love without a choice?ย 

11 Now what I am commanding you today is not too difficult for you or beyond your reach. 12 It is not up in heaven, so that you have to ask, โ€œWho will ascend into heaven to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?โ€ 13 Nor is it beyond the sea, so that you have to ask, โ€œWho will cross the sea to get it and proclaim it to us so we may obey it?โ€ 14 No, the word is very near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart so you may obey it.

15 See, I set before you today life and prosperity, death and destruction. 16 For I command you today to love the Lord your God, to walk in obedience to him, and to keep his commands, decrees and laws; then you will live and increase, and the Lord your God will bless you in the land you are entering to possess.

17 But if your heart turns away and you are not obedient, and if you are drawn away to bow down to other gods and worship them, 18 I declare to you this day that you will certainly be destroyed. You will not live long in the land you are crossing the Jordan to enter and possess.

19ย This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live 20ย and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. – Deuteronomy 30:11-20

There are tons of Scriptures like this.

Ones that make it clear we have a choice.ย  Here, Moses is speaking to the people of Israel. Heโ€™s just got done talking to them about Godโ€™s covenant and tells them God stands ready to offer them his blessing if they simply turn to him.ย  They can choose to follow their own way, but it will be one filled with pain and suffering, and while Moses couches it in terms of Godโ€™s wrath, I think weโ€™ve come to understand that itโ€™s not so much Godโ€™s wrath as it is the natural consequence of living without God in your life.ย  But itโ€™s a choice! Joshua tells the people of Israel in another time, โ€œ15ย But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord. (Joshua 24:15).โ€ Again, a choice.ย  And God offers that choice over and over and over again.ย  God never gives up on us, but he never forces us to follow him.ย 

Because choice matters.

We are not helpless.  We are not puppets.  We are beings created in the image of God and God has offered and continues to offer us a chance to make the world better.  I like what Adam Hamilton said.  He wrote, โ€œGod gave us a brain, a heart, a conscience, his Spirit, the Scriptures, and the ability to interpret them as guides to help us select the right path.โ€[4]  But ultimately the choice is up to us.  God equips us with what we need, but we still get to choose and ultimately live with the consequences of our choices. Mr. McNally died when I was only 16 years old.  I never knew back then where my life would lead me today.  I donโ€™t believe God caused Mr. McNally to be killed by a drunk driver, but I do believe God used this tragedy in my life to help me better understand the consequences of the choices we make and now I get to share that story with you.  God doesnโ€™t cause the calamities in our life, but he can bring blessing out of the deepest pain.  Does everything happen for a reason?  No, but that doesnโ€™t mean God canโ€™t open the world to you and through you to serve a higher purpose if we let him.  But that choice is up to you.  In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.


[1] Adam Hamilton, Half Truths, p. 20

[2] Ibid, p.26.

[3] Ibid, p.26.

[4] Ibid, p.37.